BIYAYA...

Best Things in my Life

2010-08-20T11:48:00.000-07:00

The morning dew on a freshly bloomed flower

The radiant sun reflecting on the waters with its vigor and power

The gentle kiss from a loving child

A tender touch when you need the most, so soft and mild

The redness of an apple so ripe and delish

The glittering stars on a dark night that embellish

A sweet smile on a tear dried face

The hug that makes the pain disappear from lonely days

A breath of fresh air after a life's pain and struggle

A nice peaceful sleep with your wifey to cuddle

The smear of ice cream on a happy kid's nose

The intoxicating fragrance from the love and the rose

The warmth of a blanket to the one who owns none

A place of shelter and hope for the one on the run

A rainbow after the rain brings hope to the hopeless

A warm cup of soup to the one who is homeless

A list that grows with awesome things in life

I thank God for this experience and just to be alive

DADDY TALK :)

2010-07-29T11:23:00.000-07:00

(An adult version of baby talk)

We can't expect kids to think like we adults do, but we adults of course can think the way kids thinks...Pero kapag ang matanda ang nag isip bata, nakupo! sobrang ang gulo ng usapan.

Napag usapan namin kanina ng isang kaibigan sa YM ang tungkol sa mga super smart na pre-school kids. Minsan nga nagtataka tayo dahil sa kanilang edad ay kung ano anong mga bagay na ang naiisip nila. Kaya naman, naisipan kong ibahagi dito ang super riot na usapan namin ng bunso kong anak na si Fionna Faith.
Heto, basahin nyo na lang kung paano kami nagra rambulan ng five years old pre-school daughter ko na super smart at super kulit kausap...(mana daw sa daddy)

excited na tuloy akong umuwi...

Conversation #1 Batang Bolera

"Papa, I LOVE YOU!..."
"Talaga anak, Love mo si papa?"
"Opo"
"Totoo?"
"Totoo po"
"Kahit wala akong pera?"
"Ay! wala kang pera papa?"
"Hindi na kita Love!"
"Jan ka na!...BYE!"
"Papadalan mo lagi si mama ng pera ha!"
Conversa
Conversation #2 Uwi ka na

"Papa miss na miss ka na namin"
"Talaga anak?...miss na miss ka na rin ni papa"
"Papa uwi ka na...kahit walang pera basta uwi ka na"
"Hindi pa puwede anak, kasi walang sasakyan si papa pauwi eh"
"Hindi ba sabi mo may car ka jan?...eh di yun ang sakyan mo pauwi"
"Hindi ko puwedeng gamitin yun pag uwi ko anak, kasi sa boss ko yun, magagalit siya sa akin"
"Ay!...masungit ang boss mo papa?"
"Opo...kaya hindi ko puwedeng dalhin yung car"
"Ay ganun?..Ano ba yan?...Eh di mag tricycle ka na lang"
"Anak, hindi puwede ang tricycle kasi malayo, Hindi ako makakarating kaagad...dapat airplane para mabilis kasi lumilipad..."
"Ay! airplane pala saskyan mo papa?"
"Eh paano ka makaka baba...ang taas taas ng lipad ng airplane?"

sumabat sa usapan ang aking asawa na halos gumugulong na sa kakatawa sa usapan naming mag ama...(naka loud speaker ang phone)

"Baby, may hagdan naman anak yung airplane, kaya makakababa si papa mo dun"
"Uhm!...wala naman akong nakikitang hagdan nung airplane ah!...paano yun?
(lumilipad kasi ang mga airplane na nakikita nya)
"Ahm...anak kasi yung hagdan, dadalhin ko sa loob ng eroplano pagsakay ko, kaya hindi mo yun makikita..."
"Ah, ok...papa, sa tapat ka ng bahay bumaba ha, para makita ka namin!"

Conversation # 3 Bahay ni Barbie

"O, anak...uuwi na ako."
"Anong gusto mong pasalubong?"
"Ay!..uuwi k na papa?"
"Opo, malapit na, so anong gusto mong pasalubong?"
"Papa, ibili mo na lang po ako ng maraming maraming chocolates..."
"Ok, chocolates...ano pa?"
"Saka po papa, ibili mo ako ng malaking Barbie doll na may haus..."
"Eh anak, wala namang haus si barbie eh, doll lang siya anak. kung gusto mo ng doll na may haus, hindi si barbie ang bibilhin natin..."
"Eh gusto ko papa si barbie...tsaka may haus kasi saan matutulog si barbie kung wala siyang haus?"
"Patulugin mo na lang sa room mo, tabi kayo sa bed"
"Eh si mama naman ang katabi ko, kawawa naman pala si barbie?"
"Bilhan mo na lang ng haus si barbie papa"
"Hindi nga puwede kasi walang haus si barbie."
"Bilhan mo nga papa eh, para magkaroon siya ng haus"
"Eh anak, paano ko madadala yun, hindi naman kakasya sa airplane yung haus?"
"Bakit hindi kakasya, eh malaki naman yung airplane?"
"Eh kasi maliit lang ang pinto nun."
"Eh di sa bintana mo idaan!"

Conversation #4 Chocolates

"Oh, anak...nabili ko na yung chocolates mo"
"Talaga papa?...Marami?"
"Opo, maraming marami...ubusin mo lahat ito ha"
"Ay!..sabi po ni teacher nakakasira daw ng teeth..."
"Eh paano mauubos yung chocolates?"
"E di bibigyan ko po si baby Angel namin, tsaka si teacher, tsaka yung mga classmates ko sa school."
"Si tito Resty, hindi mo ba bibigyan?"
"Hindi!...kasi bad siya...lagi nya ako inaaway saka sinasabihan ng panget."
"Eh si mama, hindi rin?"
"Hmmp!...kumukuha na lang naman si mama kahit hindi nagpaalam eh..."
"Eh si kuya?..."
"Hindi rin po si kuya, kasi hindi nya ako pinapasakay sa bike niya..."

biglang sumingit sa usapan ang kuya na nakikinig pala sa amin...

"Papa sabi po ni Fionna sa akinkagabi, pag binili mo daw siya ng maraming chocolates, bibigyan nya daw po yung crush nya sa school..."

"Waaaa!...ayaw ko na sa inyong mag ama kayo!...Mga panget kayo!...Mga panget!..."

"hahahahaha!" lakas ng tawa ko..

at kinausap ko si ivan, matapos iwan ni fionna ang celfon sa kanya...

"Eh ikaw Ivan, may crush ka na rin ba sa school nyo?"
"Hmp!..si papa parang TANGA!...9 years pa lng ako, grade 3 pa nga lang eh crush na daw agad!..."

waaaaaaaa...ako pa tuloy ang tinawag na tanga!...

What does it takes of a husband to be a "GOOD HUSBAND"?

2010-07-23T11:24:00.000-07:00

before doctors becomes a good doctor, they must undergo physical and psychological test. it is not required of a doctor to be hospitalized for any reason.
meanwhile, before a lawyer becomes a good lawyer he must learn to play with the laws that he is trying to preserve. it is not acceptable for a lawyer to be convicted.

but what does it takes for a husband to be a good husband?
husbands do err, as humans we are. we drink a lot, we smoke a lot, we fuck other woman...a lot! but we also try to be the best man for our lady. we love our kids, we love our wife, and we want to keep our family intact...as much as we can...but our being human makes us vulnerable and prone to error.

being a husband is a skill that doesn't require any special training course or experience. for most men, it's like they sleep one night with the woman they love, and "puff!..." they're already a husband when they wake up.

so what does it take of a husband to be a better husband?...

let me say, a good and understanding wife...

Para sa mga lalaking may Kabit...

2010-07-19T00:55:00.000-07:00

Ulan kang naligaw mula himpapawid
At biglang pumatak sa tigang kong dibdib
Aking pinagyaman ginawa kang batis
Nagtampisaw akong lihim at tahimik.

Giniginaw ako sa lamig mong handog
Puso'y nadadarang sa init na dulot
Pigil ang hininga tuwing naghahamog
Ang buong paligid sa bawal na sulok

Kamalian ka bang niyakap ang patak,
at ipinidestal sa lumikong landas?
Sabihin mo lamang pag ibig mo'y wagas
Ako'y nakalaang kahit na mautas!.

Gaano mang tagal sa pagkakabulid
Laging naghihintay paglinaw ng tubig
Iinanalanging lakas nitong dibdib
At sa habang buhay ikaw ang pag ibig....

Textmate

2010-07-14T11:55:00.000-07:00

Inspired by True-to-Life stories of Filipino Overseas workers in the Middle East...
Marami sa mga kababayan natin ang nakakaranas ng matinding pangungulila sa kanilang mga mahal sa buhay na iniwang pansamantala sa Pinas.
Tao din po ang mga OFW, hindi bato. Nangungulila, naghahanap ng kalinga...at minsan ay nadarapa at nahuhulog sa bitag ng isang BAWAL NA RELASYON...

Ako ay umalis sa bayan kong mahal
Baon ang pangarap na magandang bukas
Sa malayong lugar ng gitnang silangan
Ay magtatrabaho at kikita ng dolyar

Sa pag alis ko ay iniwang pangako
Sa aking pamilya ay tapat ang puso
Hindi magtataksil sa asawang irog
At siya lang ang tanging laman nitong puso

Ngunit di naglaon lungkot ang nadama
Ang tapat kong puso ngayo'y nangulila
Ang irog kong mahl na siyang sinisinta
Malayo sa piling ko't hindi siya nakikita

Kaya naman upang ang puso'y maaliw
Sa mga katoto ako'y nagliwaliw
At nasabi ko ngang akoy nalulumbay
Sa sinisinta kong sa aki'y nawalay.

Siya'y biglang nangiti at saka natawa
At kanyang sinabing "madali yan kosa"
Hanap mo ba'y aliw sayong pag iisa?
kita ay bibigyan ng ka-textmate baga

Kanya ngang binigay pangalan ng dilag
Kalakip numerong dapat kong makontak
Subukan ko muna at ng mnakatiyak
Na dulot ay ligaya sa pusong umiiyak

Sa pagtunog pa lang niyaong telepono
Ako'y kinabahang tila baguntao
Ang pinitg ng puso ay biglang lumukso
Hindi ko na mawari ang pakiramdam ko

At ng sumagot na dilag na kinontak
Sa kabilang linya ako ay nagalak
Nagpakilala siya at kami'y nag usap
Naghalo ang saya't excitement kumbaga

Sa bawat araw ng aming pag uusap
Ako ay masaya't puso'y nagagalak
Nakalimutan na ang pangakong tapat
Sa aking pamilyang naiwan sa Pinas

Heto ako ngayon, masakit ang ulo
BUtas ang bulsa ko't buhay ay magulo
Kaya kabayan ko ikaw ay matuto
Tiisin ang lungkot at magpakatino

Sa pagsintang bawal kapag nadupilas
Ang pusong marupok maligaw ng landas
Walang mararating na magandang bukas
Matatauhan kang ang bulsa ay butas.

Ronald V. Rafer

Moving Forward...

2010-07-06T11:35:00.000-07:00

Waiting for HOPE to be drawn closer...
or hoping for WAIT to be overcome!.

Are we waiting for HOPE to approach us?
or is hope WAITING for us to believe in it?
To function the way it should be
which is the bright side of every existence
We are seeking to unleash it's goodness
When all the odds are screaming the other way around?

When does the function of HOPE exactly works?
Is it before we hold our life and start WAITING?
Or is it after we let go and start BELIEVING?
Where we acknowledge such a thing would exist?

Is it the idea of it's existence that excites us?
Believing that it is out there and it will come to us
Though not straight away,
Yet there is a chance throughout our lifetime that it will.

Why are we sometimes afraid of HOPING?
Are we aware of the outcome of a certain circumstance
Or we do not want to expect and wait until it comes?
Afraid of not finding what we have hoped for at the end of our waiting?

Is hope paralyzing?
Because while we are HOPING, we are WAITING.
And while we are WAITING, we are actually doing NOTHING but putting our lives ON HOLD until the situation gets resolved.
But can anything be resolved by doing NOTHING?

Is hope an everlasting feeling?
Or can it be turned on and off depending upon how good or bad the situation is?

What is HOPE capable of?
Is it applicable to all matters concerning living our life?
Or despair has to have some role to balance our existence as a whole?

Can we HOPE without WAITING?
Can we WAIT without HOPING?

Can we wait for a dream to come true without being optimistic about what would come out of it?
Are we superficial not wanting to be appreciated or gratified?
Are we a fool to go on living without realizing the impact of our actions into the lives of the people around us?

Why should we care to wait in the first place if the result would not make a difference at all?
How could we maintian ourselves motivated to keep on living a life that we believe nothing good would emerge out of it?

If life is all about waiting, then actions will never be taken, problems will never be resolved, and the very concept of living a life would be alienated.
javascript:void(0)
But everything CHANGES with HOPE added in it..,

Because LIFE is about GOING ON and MOVING FORWARD!..

ron:)

WONDERING...

2010-07-03T12:03:00.000-07:00

WHAT IF...

I saw a movie last night, and in it was a statement about two simple words, "what" and "if"...

These two words by themselves are very innocent and really can be implemented in many sentences and questions, but if you put them together, it forms a very powerful question...

What If??

This question is the very question that can and will bring you back to a certain instance in your life where you made a choice. A choice that you may not be happy with today and often think about why you did it, but discovered you settled on it because of one of two reasons...

You settled on that decision because it was the easier path to travel at that specific moment in your life, or you did not think that you could take the other choice because of fear of failure or what other people would think.

Now, years later you think about that one specific choice or choices you have made in you life and your mind and thoughts start to take aim at your decision...

You have an inner battle with yourself and contemplate if you had that decision again, what would you do?

What would your life be like today??

Would it be totally different?

Would you be where you are right now, in the exact space sitting and reading this??

Here again lies the very important question...

What if you had that decision to make again??

What would you do??

Would you take the other path because of what you know now, or would you think it would be too late in time to go down the other path all together??

Your mind will probably and inevitably tell you not to do it...Not to do it because you are comfortable in life and doing something different may bring you down a path of uncomfortableness and anxiety may set in.

But is that not how we grow stronger and learn things about ourselves by doing or trying things we never thought possible? Pushing one's self to the limit and going beyond our normal comfort zone!!!!!

In life, there is an old cliche' that I know... It is "Where there is a will, there is a way".

I truly believe if you want something bad enough, you can do it and achieve it. You can correct the mistakes of your decisions from the past, and go out and find happiness in the right decision for your future.

It is never too late do anything in life...

You are on this earth for the time period of a blink of an eye in respect to time overall. Everyday we have to make decisions and have choices thrown at us that could hinder our forward motion or even change the course of our lives all together.

When entering into a decision, make sure it is the right one. Make sure that you play out your answer a year from now, or even ten or twenty years from now.

But if you find yourself in that position of wondering "What if", then usually you have made the wrong decision to begin with, and must correct it so you can live in peace not only now, but for your future as well...

My Solitude

2010-07-02T11:42:00.001-07:00

I cannot and will not lie down and kneel before my life. I cannot and I will not let the destiny that life has dealt me be the only destiny worth living for. I am I, you are you, we are distinct and we are individuals. I will carve my own destiny and I will dream my own dreams. I will walk bare footed through the warm golden sand, sleep naked under the stars and listen to the sea as it lashes against the rocks of hypocrisy. I will let the wind play with my hair and be at one with nature. This is my island and it is called hope.

As long as I am alive I have hope there is a chance, there is a dream to be fulfilled and a life worth living. I aspire not for wealth, for success, to conquer lands or the minds of men but seek refuge in conquering myself. I seek refuge in the hope of touching the stars in the blackness of the night. I ask for the courage to confront my greatest enemy, myself. I ask for the courage to help me to realise the potential that burns within my soul.

As I walk along my island of hope, alone, with merely my thoughts and the sound of my beating heart who have I become and what am I to become? As the sun sets on the horizon, there is calm all around me. The day nears to an end and slowly the sky goes black. Through the darkness appear the glittering eyes of the world and they gaze down at me, the moon smiles at me yet I am I. An eagle flies above me with its wings of hope spread wide into the vastness and emptiness of the ocean in front of me.

I am finally at peace with my soul. My island, which I have strove to seek all my life, is now within my grasp. I have arrived. My island is a place of non-attachment and non-possession. It is a place of calmness where the pains of yesterday are but a distant memory. I have courage within my heart to face my ultimate destiny. As it looks at me, I smile at it. I no longer fear that which I once feared, I no longer yearn for more but am content with what I have gained; I no longer yearn for a life of the past. I look at the demons within me and I have defeated them and they have not defeated me. I have finally conquered myself.

I now embrace my island without regret and walk into my destiny. I have been born, I have lived, I have loved and been loved, I have failed and succeeded, and I have forgiven. There is nothing more for me to do. I have become what I essentially was at birth, myself. I close my eyes and my soul transpires out of my body and takes me to a higher level of existence. I leave the pains of the world and embrace the wonders of what lie in front of me. A teardrop falls from my soul into the ocean, that is how it was created. I cease to exist

My Life...

2010-07-02T11:30:00.001-07:00

My Life

This is how I want to live it. It may not be how I live, but it is the way I want to live. I want to live my life in such a way that it will be remembered. I want to leave an impression on everyone I come in contact with.

I want to live as Thoreau said, “to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life, to live so sturdily and spartan like as to put to rout all that was not life, to cut a broad swath and shave close, to drive life into a corner, and reduce it to it’s lowest terms.”

I want to be open and honest with everyone, to be remembered by my actions. I want to lead my life in such a way that I can be respected. I want to live my life so I can be an example for others. I want to aspire for greatness but never be famous. I want to live sure of myself. If I doubt myself, others will too. I want to live my life in such a way so that in the future I won’t regret my past.

I want to believe in myself. I want to capture the strength I have deep inside. I want to believe in tomorrow and what it might bring. I want to be able to trust and in turn be trusted.

I want to begin every day thinking this is the beginning of a new day. I can waste it or use it for good. What I do today is important because I am using a day of my life for it. When tomorrow comes, today will be gone forever leaving in its place, something I traded for it.

I want to be a friend to everyone. I want to always have a dream. I want to be remembered for the good I did in my life. People won’t remember what I said, people won’t remember what I did, but they will always remember how I made them feel.

“I shall pass through this world, but once. Any good therefore that I can show, to any human being, let me do it now for I shall never pass this way again.”

* Si Miling* (basta lalake)

2010-06-17T11:49:00.000-07:00

Si Miling (Basta Lalake)

Siya'y si manang Milagros, pinsang buo ko.

Mas matanda siya sa akin ng sampung taon, ang pinakabunsong anak nina tiyo Gudong at tiya Iska na kapatid ng tatay ko at kapitbahay namin sa probinsiya. Nakapagtapos siya ng kursong "komersiyo" sa isang kolehiyo sa kabisera at nakapagtrabaho bilang isang "clerk" sa munisipyo ng aming bayan. "Rosing" ang nakagisnan kong itinatawag sa kanya ng mga kakilala at kaibigan. Nakatayo ang kanilang bahay sa isang malawak na bakuran na kinatutubuan din ng isang malaki at matabong na punong sampalok.

Gayong pangkaraniwang anak ng isang magsaska sa probinsiya si manang Rosing, hindi naman pangkaraniwang kagandahan ang kanyang taglay. Kumbaga sa bulaklak, isa siya sa pinakamagandang rosas sa hardin ng aming nayonnoong kapanahunan niya. Bata pa lamang ay madalas na siyang mapiling mutya sa paaralang pinapasukan. Madalas din siyang maging mutya sa kapistahan ng aming nayon, at minsan nga ay napiling mutya sa aming bayan.

Marahil, naisip niya na hindi bagay sa angking ganda ang palayaw na "Rosing" kaya ginawa niya itong "Millette" ng siya'y magdalaga na. Tinanong ko siya minsang nag uusap kami sa ilalim ng punong sampalok

"Bakit mo binago ang pangalan mo manang Rosing?"

"Huwag mo nga akong matawag tawag na manang! ate Millette na lang, o kaya'y "sist".

"Alam mo kasi pangalang bata ang Rosing, masakit sa tenga pakinggan. Mas bagay talaga sa akin ang Millette."

"Ganun pala" nasambit ko sa aking sarili. "Kapag nagbago na ang edad at hitsura ng isang tao ay nagbabago na rin ang kanyang pangalan"

Sampung taong gulang na ako noon, at magdadalawampu naman si ate Millete.Halos gabi gabi ay may nakikita akong umaakyat ng ligaw sa kanya. Madalas na rin siyang hinaharana.

"Ang daming lumiligaw sayo ate" sabi ko ulit. "Siguro me nobyo ka na ano?"

"Wala pa! wala sa mga lumiligaw sa akin ang mga katangian ng lalaking hinahanap ko!"

"Eh ano ba ang mga katangiang iyon?"

"Marami ah!, Magandang lalaki, Mayaman, may pinag aralan, Mabait at Marunong magmahal."

Dagli akong nag isip. Sa aking murang isipan ay gumuhit ang maraming mga katanungan.

Napatingala ako at napatingin sa itaas ng punong sampalok. Sa mga sanga niyon, sa pinaka mayor na sanga ay napansin ko ang tila halamang kumapit doon.

"Ate ano yun?" tanong ko sabay turo sa halaman.

Tumingala siya. "Dapo yun" sabi niya.

"Eh hindi naman kaya niya sasakalin ang punong sampalok kapag lumago yun? Bakit hindi nyo alisin?"

"Huwag!" sabi niya. "Magaganda ang mga bulaklak, sayang"

Lumipas ang ilang taon, dalawampu't lima na ang edad ni ate Millette, magtatapos na rin ako ng highschool noon. Pero sa ngayon, hindi na "Millette" ang tawag sa kanya kundi "Rose" at wala pa rin siyang boyfriend.

"Bakit wala ka pang nobyo ate Rose?" tanong ko sa kanya minsang nag uusap kami sa ilalim ng punong sampalok.

"Hindi pa kasi dumarating ang lalaking bagay sa akin."

"Eh ano ba yung lalaking bagay sayo?"

"Yung lalaking mayaman, may pinag aralan, mabait at marunong magmahal."

Ng tingalain ko ang dapo sa punong sampalok ay napansin kong lumago iyon. Lumipat na rin sa iba pang mga sanga. Magaganda pa rin ang mga bulaklak.

Nakatapos ako ng highschool at nagtungo sa Maynila upang doon magpatuloy sa pag aaral sa kolehiyo. Tapos na ako ng aking kurso ng ako'y magbakasyon sa aming nayonat muli kaming nagkausap ni at Rose. Nagulat pa ako ng malamang hindi na pala "Rose" ang tawag sa kanya kundi "Mila" at nalaman ko na wala pa rin siyang nobyo gayung magtatatlumpo na ang kanyang edad.

"Hindi pa ba dumarating ang lalaking bagay sayo ate Mila?"

"Oo nga eh."

"Eh ano ba yung lalaking hinahanap mo?"

"Yung lalaking mayaman, may pinag aralan at marunong magmahal."

Sa maynila na ako nagkaroon ng magandang trabaho kaya't naging madalang na ang pagbabakasyon ko sa aming nayon at ng minsang nagbakasyon ako ay nakausap ko muli si manag Mila.

Magtatatlumpo't lima na noon ang kanyang edad, "single" pa rin at ang naririnig kong itinatawag sa kanya ay "lagring" na.

"Wala pa rin ba manang Lagring?" biro ko sa kanya.

"Wala na yata eh." sabay tawa niya.

"Simple lang naman ang hinahanap ko sa isang lalake."

"Ano?"

"Yung mabait at marunong magmahal."

Sa punong sampalok ay napansin kong malagong malago na ang dapo. Kumapit na rin ito sa halos lahat ng sanga. Magaganda pa rin ang mga bulaklak nito.

May sarili na akong pamilya ng muli akong magbakasyon sa aming nayon kasama ang aking asawa at ang una naming anak, ngunit dalaga pa rin si manang Lagring. Pero sa pagkakataong iyon, hindi na siya nagpalit ng bansag. Halata na nag mga guhit sa kanyang noo ngunit maganda pa rin ang hubog ng kanyang katawan bagama't mag aapat napu na ang kanyang edad.

"Tinalo na kita manag Lagring, me trophy na ako na ipinaghehele sa gabi." kantiyaw ko sa kanya.

"Iniinggit mo naman ako eh." tawa niya.

"Eh ano ba talaga ang lalaking gusto mo? Baka maihanap kita ng "Manila boy" na magiging darling mo?"

"Yung lalaking marunong magmahal"

Ngunit hindi ko natupad ang sinabi kongh ihahanap ko siya ng lalaking marunong magmahal kahit na biro lang yun. Nakarating ako ng ibang bansa at nasingkaw sa pagtratrabaho doon.

Lumipas pa ang ilang taon bago ako muling nakapagbakasyon sa aming nayon. mag aapat napu't lima na ang edad ni manang Lagring. Dalaga pa rin. Ngunit sa ngayon, naging Rosing ulit ang tawag sa kanya.

"Bakit naging Rosing ka ulit manang?" pabiro kong tanong.

"Hindi ba masakit sa tenga at saka pangalan ng bata yan?"

Hindi natawa si manang Rosing.

"Bakit?" Paasik niyang tanong.

"Bata pa naman ako ah!" at inirapan niya ako.

Naging mapakla ang matamis kong ngiti.

"Nagbibiro lang ako ate." sabi ko sa kanya.

Nangiti na rin siya. "Oh, di ba sabi mo noon ihahanap mo ako ng Manila boy na magiging darling ko?"

"Me nahanap ka ba?"

Napakamot ako sa batok. "Hindi nga ate eh, na busy ako sa abroad."

"Hamo't sa pagbabalik ko'y ihahanap kita ng "foreigner"."

"Ano nga ba yung mga katangian ng lalaking hanap mo, manang Rosing?"

"BASTA LALAKE!"

Napatingala ako sa mga sanga ng punong sampalok, Natatalukbungan na yun ng lubos ng dapo at nagsisimujla na ring matuyo ang mga dahon. Alam kong sa muling paglipas ng panahon, hindi maglalaon ay mamamatay na rin ang dating malabay at matipunong puno...

Tukso ng iyong Halik!

2010-02-19T05:51:00.001-08:00

Tukso ng Iyong Halik

Ininom ko ang hiningang sa dibdib mo'y umaalon
Ng lumala ang pagsintang doon yata nagkakanlong
Damdam ko ba ay nagkita ang maliyab na tagunton
Ng tagpuang pinag isa ng kung ano't anong gatong!

Ang totoo'y di mabilang ang hinabing pakiusap
Na sinaksi ang simbahan at ang santang palaiyak
Alam ko mang kasalanan ang ubod ng aking hangad
Ay may lakas na dahilang sa pithaya'y nakalapat!

Aminin ng ang pag ibig ay maluhong pagnanasa
Patikimin kahit saglit ang labi ng makalupa
'Pag nagsindi iyang halik na may haplos, magkukusa
Ang hanap na pagniniig na may basbas ng bathala!

Saan nga ba hahanapin ang matamis na pagsuyo,
Kundi diyan sa hinaing nga labi mong nanunukso!...

ron:)
al doha distrcit ad-dharan KSA

When to end a relationship?

2010-02-17T10:51:00.000-08:00

My ears ringing with obscenities and insults, I hung up the phone wanting nothing more than to curl up in a corner and cry. Breathing deeply, I called upon all the testosterone I could muster up to keep the tears at bay. Another girl, another year of my life seemingly wasted on the futile pursuit of true love. Not knowing what else to do, I went to my local supermarket, purchased a six pack of my favorite micro-brew and locked myself in my room where I could listen to depressing music and drink alone in peace. This may seem a sad and unhealthy way of dealing with grief, but in doing so I came to a couple of realizations about marrying in general. First, I realized that I had allowed this relationship (just like I had allowed everyone of my past relationships), to take on a life all of its own and eventually spiral out of my control. Second, it occurred to me that in my endless efforts to please my significant others, I had lost sight of what I needed from a relationship to make ME happy.

When I speak of a relationship taking on a life of its own, I am referring to what I like to call Broken Man Syndrome (although I've found that Broken Woman Syndrome is quite more common). Common symptoms include frequent emasculation, constant tongue lashings regarding your flaws and shortcomings, and worst of all persistent attempts to change any or all of your core personality traits. Yes, I have been guilty of accepting all of the above abuses, and on multiple occasions. Consequently, I have learned to look for certain red flags which may tell you that it's time to call it quits on a failing relationship.

First-Sometimes it's better to end a relationship before it begins. For example, you should never have to feel pressured to rush into a serious relationship when you would rather be casually dating. When you find the right person, nature will take over and a relationship will likely result. If you feel like you're at the receiving end of a sales pitch or an ultimatum, there's probably a million different reasons you shouldn't be dating this person. At this point it would be appropriate to excuse yourself and run like hell.

Second-If you've decided to devote yourself to one particular person, odds are that you've already come to terms with their positive and negative traits. Hopefully you've made peace with their imperfections. You should expect the same courtesy in return. If you find yourself defending core characteristics of your personality (barring traits that may cause you to hurt yourself or others), the time has come to hit the road. Relationships are about two people accepting each other for who they are-not about molding another person into what you would like them to be.

Third-Nobody's perfect, and most normal people know this. If you're constantly hearing about your flaws and the words aren't coming from the Almighty Himself, scold the offending party for being an arrogant nitpicker and then initiate a breakup. At this point your relationship has become emotionally abusive and you need to leave before you're caused any serious psychological trauma.

Fourth-Sometimes it can be easy to lose sight of your own needs, especially at the hands of a control freak. If you begin to feel like you're doing a whole lot of giving and not too much receiving, maybe it's time to ask yourself why you're involved in a parasitic relationship. Some people can be like emotional leeches, sucking the life out of you until they're happily engorged and you're shriveled and writhing on the floor. Never lose sight of what you need in another person...if you're not happy and fulfilled, there's no way you can maintain a healthy relationship. Remember, a relationship should be a two way street and exhibit all the balance of a tightrope walker.

My initial years of relationships were miserable and traumatic because I never jumped ship at the right time. Rather, I waited until my relationships escalated into full-blown crisis mode, burst into flames and came crashing down in a final hellish blaze. All it takes to avoid being consumed in the wreckage of a failing relationship is a little bit of self respect and knowing the right time when to call it quits....

engagge the four wheel drive

2010-02-17T10:19:00.000-08:00

one hot summer weekend, i went out hiking with my friends in the al kut desert of the al haza regi0n. we usually go out every weekend kapag walang pasok or if we are n0t busy with something. para makapag b0nding, makapag unwind sa isang linggong pagod sa trabaho, or simply for past time, pampatanggal ng homesick sa mahabang paghihintay na matapos na ang tila walang hanggang kontratang binubuno namin dito sa disyerto. s0metimes, we go on fishing in salty desert lagoons in al uyon, or just make fun driving in the desert making a point to notice things like sheeps and camels grazing on what was left of the desert grass in summer heat, watching desert birds flying here and there or laughing on cars with funny license plates.
para maiba naman, naisipan kong yayain silang umakyat sa bundok. mountain hiking. its a lot of fun and a good exercise as well. we started the trip with fun, singing, dancing, cooking and eating, telling funny stories and playing little games like "truth or consequence" or solving brain twisting riddles. early on friday morning, we climbed the mountain and hiked the trails for few hours. by noon, we were all too tired to endure the hike, adding to the fact that the summer heat in the desert is almost unbearable at mid day...when the group paused to get rests in a shade, i encourage them by saying "come on guys! engage the four wheel drive, and let's finish the hike!" they then get tougher, and we finish the effort in no time...

in the evening, while i was sitting in the canopy, one of the boys approach me and said, "sir let me interpret the phrase "engage the four wheel drive". of course i was delighted, and listened as he was giving his explanati0n "we humans are made of outside and inside, body and spirit" i nodded in aggrement. he went on to say "both body and spirit works simultaneously to support each other, but when we exert extra effort, the body starts first until all its strengths were depleted. it is then that the spirit kicks in and provide the additional energy needed to ensure the survival of the body."
i was delighted by his explanati0n, but i was laughing unc0ntrollably. quite embarrassed by my reaction, he asked me why i was laughing out loud. i said, "your explanation is so bright and interesting but all i meant by that was i wish i brought my SUV up in the mountain, engage the four wheel drive and get the hike over with, sitting comfortably in my car so that i do not have to suffer trekking on foot with all the heat, the sands and dust in the desert filling up my lungs."

as i lay down on my bed that night i began to realized, for almost 2 months, i was in a tough battle with hematocytosis, a disease of the blood. a point was then made clear to me! "we all have an inner strengths which we can use when needed. that inner strength does n0t only activate our survival instincts when necessary but also makes us pioneers and successful human beings."

then i smiled again and sighed...

...there are always different ways of rationalizing things

Pilipino KA...

2010-01-26T10:49:00.000-08:00

Pilipino ka....pero

Sabi MO , ang gobyerno natin ay palpak.

Sabi MO , ang mga batas natin ay sinauna at hindi patas.

Sabi MO , ang lokal na pamahalaan natin ay hindi maganda ang pagkolekta ng basura at ang paglilinis ng mga lugar.

Sabi MO , hindi gumagana ang mga telepono, katatawanan ang kalagayan ng trapiko, at hindi nakakarating sa paroroonan ang mga sulat.

Sabi MO , parang nasadlak sa basura ang ating buong bansa.

Sabi Mo , sabi MO, sabi MO.

E ano'ng ginagawa mo tungkol dito?

Kumuha ka ng isang taong papunta sa Singapore . Bigyan mo sya ng pangalan, yung sa IYO. Bigyan MO sya ng mukha, yung sa IYO. Lumabas KA sa airport nang pinakamatino mong sarili na maipagmamalaki sa mundo..

Sa Singapore Hindi KA nagtatapon ng upos ng sigarilyo sa kalye. Ipinagmamalaki MO ang magaganda nilang underpass. Nagbabayad KA ng mga 60 pesos para makapagmaneho sa Orchard Road (parang EDSA) mula alas 5 hanggang alas 8 ng gabi. Bumalik KA sa parking lot para bayaran ang parking tiket mo kung napasobra ka ng oras sa shopping o sa pagkain sa isang restaurant. Sa Singapore , wala KAng sinasabi, meron ba?

Hindi MO susubukang kumain sa lantad kapag Ramadan sa Saudi Arabia. Hindi MO susubukang lumabas ng bahay na walang takip ang mukha sa Riyadh o Makkah.
Hindi MO susubukang suhulan ang isang empleyado ng kumpanya ng telepono sa London para mapunta sa ibang tao ang mga long distance na tawag mo.

Hindi MO susubukang lumampas ng 90 kilometers per hour ang takbo ng sasakyan mo sa Washington, at saka sasabihin sa pulis "Alam mo kung sino ako?"

Bakit di MO subukang dumura o magtapon ng upos ng sigarilyo o balat ng kendi sa mga kalye sa Tokyo ?

Bakit hindi MO subukang bumili ng pekeng mga papeles sa Boston tulad ng ginagawa sa Recto?

Pinag-uusapan pa rin natin IKAW.

IKAW na gumagalang at sumusunod sa patakarang banyaga sa ibang bansa pero hindi makasunod sa mga BATAS at PATAKARAN ng sariliu mong bansa.

IKAW na tapon ng tapon sa kalye pagtuntong mo pa lang sa lupa.

Kung IKAW ay nakikisalamuha at pumupuri ng sistema sa bansang banyaga, bakit hindi KA maging ganyan sa Pilipinas?

Minsan sa isang panayam, ang dating Subic Administrator na si Gordon ay may katwiran ng sinabi nyang "Ang mga aso ng mayayaman ay pinalalakad at pinadudumi ng may-ari sa kalye, tapos sila mismo ang pumupuna sa may katungkulan sa kapalpakan sa paglilinis ng mga kalye. Ano ang gusto nilang gawin ng mga may katungkulan? Magwalis tuwing makakaramdam ng hindi maganda sa tiyan ang kanilang alaga?"

Sa America , bawat may-ari ng alaga ay dapat maglinis matapos ang pagdumi ng aso. Ganuon din sa Japan .

Gagawin ba ng mga Pilipino yun dito? Tama sya.

Pumupunta tayo sa botohan para pumili ng manunungkulan sa gobyerno at pagkatapos nuon ay tinatanggal na natin sa sarili ang responsibilidad. Uupo tayo sa isang tabi at paghihintay ng pagkalinga at umaasa na gagawin ng gobyerno ang lahat habang wala tayong iniaalay para tulungan sila.

Umaasa tayo sa pamahalaan na maglinis, ngunit hindi naman tayo titigil sa pagtatapon ng basura sa kung saan-saan, at ni hindi tayo pupulot ng anumang piraso ng papel para itapon sa basurahan.

Pagdating sa mga panlipunang talakayin tulad nang hindi pagiging tapat sa kasal, sa mga dalagang ina, sa pagtatalik ng walang basbas ng kasal, at iba pa, maingay tayong nagpoprotesta ngunit patuloy naman nating ginagawa ang mga ito.

Sa sandaling tayo ay mangulila kapag nasa labas tayo ng bansa, naghahanap tayo ng aliw sa iba, kadalasan sa kapwa rin natin Pilipino, na hindi natin iniisip ang ating katungkulan na ating sinumpaan sa ating pamilya nuong narito pa tayo.

Tapos sinisisi natin ang pamahalaan kapag nakikita natin ang karahasan sa kabataan, pagkagumon sa bawal na gamot, at iba pa, samantalang sinimulan natin ito sa hindi pagpansin sa pangangailangan ng ating mga anak ng tunay na pag-gabay at responsibilidad ng isang magulang.

Ang sabi natin, "Ang buong sistema ang kailangang magbago. Ano ang magagawa kung ako lang ang magpapabago sa aking pamilya?"

E sino ang magbabago ng sistema?

Ano ba ang mga sankap ng sistema? Napakaginhawa sa atin na ang sistema ay binubuo ng ating mga kapitbahay, mga ibang tahanan, ibang syudad, ibang
komunidad, at ang pamahalaan. Pero hindi kasama IKAW at AKO. Pagdating sa ating pagkakaroon ng positibong handog sa sistema, ikinakandado natin ang sarili, pati
na ang ating pamilya sa loob ng isang ligtas na pugad at tumatanaw na lang tayo sa malayong mga lugar at bansa at naghihintay ng isang Mr. Clean na dumating at
maghatid na mga himala.

O lumilikas tayo. Parang mga tamad na duwag na hindi pinatatahimik ng ating mga takot, tumatakbo tayo sa Amerika upang makisalo sa kanilang luwalhati at
purihin sa kanilang sistema. Pero pag naging masalimuot sa New York tatakbo tayo sa Japan o Hongkong. Pag nagkahirapan ang paghanap ng trabaho sa
Hongkong, sakay agad tayo sa susunod na eroplano patungong Gitnang Silangan. Pag may digmaan sa Gulf, inaasahan nating masagip at mapauwi ng Gobyernong
Pilipino.

Lahat ay handang umabuso at gumahasa sa bansa. Walang nag-iisip na handugan ang sistema. Ang konsyensya natin ay nakasanla sa pera. Mga mahal kong kababayan,
ang sulating ito ay matinding nakakakislot ng isipan, nangangailangan ng maraming pagmumuni-muni, at tumutusok din sa konsyensya. Medyo inuulit ko lang ayon sa ating salita ang mga salita ni John F.Kennedy sa kanyang kabansa upang maitugma sa ating mga Pilipino:

"Itanong natin kung ano ang magagawa natin sa ating bansang Pilipinas at gawin ang nararapat upang ang Pilipinas ay maging tulad ng Amerika at ibang
kanlurang bansa ngayon."

Bakit hindi kaya natin gawin kung ano ang kailangan ng Pilipinas sa atin....

Living Between TWO WORLDS

2010-01-23T09:58:00.000-08:00

Usapan sa tambayan ng mga OFW’s sa Saudi Arabia…
Ang dalawang mundong ginagalawan ng mga Filipino expatriates na namumuhay at nagtatrabaho sa ibang bansa..

“sa pilipinas ay isang butihing ama o ina, pero sa ibang bansa ay may ibang kinakasama”

“kapag nagbabakasyon, feeling rich, para maipakita na can afford…pero sa ibang bansa trabahong kalabaw at doble doble ang part time jobs na ginagawa para kumita ng perang pansustina sa ganung larawan ng buhay na ipinapakita”

“sa harap ng pamilya at mga kaibigan sa pilipinas ay astig at macho ang kilos at dating, pero wag maloka kung makikita siya sa ibang bansa na ala marriane rivera at daig pa si darna sa ka artehan kapag dumadalo sa mga gatherings sa istiraha”

Isang kaibigan ang dumating mula sa pakikipag chat sa kanyang pamilya, at panandaliang naputol ang palitan ng mga kuro kuro….

“naka chat ko ang aking asawa at mga anak sa internet”
“nakausap mo na pala eh bakit parang iiyak at lungkot na lungkot ka?”
“sabi kasi ng bunso ko…”mama, kunin na natin si papa at iuwi natin sa bahay” habang hinahawakan nila ng kuya niya ang ang aking mukha sa screen ng computer. gusto kong umiyak, yakapin at halikan sila, pero hindi puiwedeng magpakita ng lungkot ang isang OFW, dahil baka lalong malungkot at umiyak si misis…sa aking dibdib na lang at lungkot at pagka giliw na nadarama”

Biglang natahimik ang grupo…

Matagal!
at dagling binago ang paksa ng usapan….

Siguro dahil sa iisang dahilan….
Dahil lahat sila bilang mga OFW ay namumuhay at dapat matutong mamuhay sa dalawang mundo na kanilang ginagalawan.
Sa harap ng naiwang pamilya sa pinas na sumasandal at umaasa sa kanila, dapat silang maging matatag…Masaya, kahit na kadalasan ay lumong lumo na…”OK lang ako dito, maayos naman ang lahat” tila ba naka program na sa utak ang otomatikong isasagot sa pamilya kahit ang katotohanan ay lubog na sa pagtitiis at paghihirap…
Na malakas at walang sakit, para huwag silang mag alala…kahit ang katotohanan ay nakahiga sa pagamutan at hirap kumilos habang kinakausap ng mahal na pamilya sa pilipinas…Dapat laging matatag…para maipakita ang “role” ng isang moog na sandalan…isang matatag na ama…butihing ina…isang ulirang anak na laging handang magmahal, maglingkod at magpakasakit alalng alang sa pamilya…larawan ng isang matibay na sandalan sakabila ng katotohanang marami sa kanila ang naghahanap din ng isang matatag na pader na masasandalan…
Nakakalungkot isipin, subalit ang isang OFW ay parang isang punching bag, na puwedeng suntukin ng paulit ulit pero hindi puwedeng gumanti ng suntok…at mas pinipili na huwag sumigaw kahit siya ay nasasaktan…hindi gagawing gumanti, dahil sa iisang dahilan…

dahil siya ay nagmamahal!…

Mahal ng isang OFW ang kanyang pamilya….
pamilyang pansamantalang iniwan para bigyan ng mas magandang kinabukasan…
Kahit na mangyari pa na kailanganin niyang mabuhay sa dalawang magka ibang mundo…

…and only an OFW can understand another OFW….
Dahil pareho sila ng buhay na pinagdadaanan

Ronald Villaluz Rafer
Operation Support and Maintenance
DLPS, Abqaiq Saudi Arabia

Habang Maikli ang KUMOT...

2010-01-22T09:18:00.000-08:00

Habang Maikli ang kumot...

Tayong mga Pinoy ay napakasipag. Trabaho dito, trabaho dun. Kayod sa umaga, kayod sa gabi. 8-5 na nga ang trabaho, may sideline pang pagtitinda sa gabi. Hindi naman tayo suwapang, multi-tasking lang.

Kaya hindi ako naniniwalang mahirap ang buhay ng isang Pinoy, kasi tayo pag may konting pera nasa mall na. Gasta dito, gasta doon. Walang tigil sa pag gasta habang may pera...Ngayon kung nagkamali ng computation sa paggasta, natural eh di pulubi mode muna. Kung may pera na ulit, eh di all the way hapi-hapi ulit.

Ganun ang karamihan sa pinoy...at guilty ako dun.

Maiksi lang ang buhay eh, kumayod tayo para kumita at gamitin natin ang pinaghirapan natin habang nabubuhay pa tayo. Para ano pa kasi at nagtratrabaho tayo di ba? Kung hindi naman tayo magiging masaya...Eh di magpakasaya na!

Kaya yung mga nagsasabing mag-ipon para yumaman? Mga sinungaling yun kasi aanhin mo naman ang lahat ng yaman na yan, kung ang buhay mo ay malungkot naman?

Over a cup of coffee

2010-01-21T09:59:00.000-08:00

Aside from the natural distinctive aroma of the roasted beans of brewed coffee, I most love simple conversation over a cup of coffee blended with the presence of my friends.

One chilly winter morning, my friends and I were sitting around a small table in our cafeteria talking about trivial things. We were freezing inside our jackets and our hands were as cold as cat's nose but a hot coffee fired up our conversation and fueled our bonds. It may sound like nonsense, but it was actually a special moment in time. What really matters most then was the pleasant conversation inside that small cafeteria. I haven't met some of those men before, and I say that first impressions are usually lasting. We brought the gathering to ones of our homes and unleashed the communications over more steaming cups of hot coffee. Evryone laid down their cards, expressed their ideas, talk about themselves, and listened as others talked. Differences were set aside and gaps were bridged.

These things happened in a cold wintry atmosphere when melancholy usually prevails and gray clouds lowers over a gloomy lethargy Winter is a season we feel sedated, and would rather stay in the comfort of our homes. Coffee is just right for passing time, relaxing and talking. Holding hot coffee mugs warms our hands and talking with friends while sipping over a cup of coffee tightens our bonds with them.

This story illustrates the essence of communications in building relationships. Furthermore, it helps builds successful work. Communications for me is the greatest invention men had ever made. It plays a vital part in our relationships with our families, friends, companies, and communities. Effective communications plays a significant role in a successful organization. Keeping communications line open will go a long way toward creating and maintianing a healthy environment.

Friendship is a continous communication full of interest, whether warmed over a cup of coffee or not.

The Beginning...

2010-01-20T09:33:00.000-08:00

"The day that I left my homeland is the day that I start to live..."

The beginning

It was a cold wintry morning in 2005 when I boarded a Manila bound bus in Sta. Rosa Laguna, at the end of my resources and a the end of my rope. I pt back in my bag the newspaper clippings which have been responsible for giving me an inspiration at a time when I needed it most. At 26 years, everything I have tried had somehow failed to hold on me. in fact, I have long been in doubt whether or not there was anything really in meI was recently been fired from a job that I dont really learned to like eventhough it was the only job that I knew and was the only thing that keeps me alive and well. My physical stature makes everyone think that I was a hard man, but in reality, I was just nobody better than an no good asshole with no home and no kinsfolk to speak of, no friends, no money, no sweetheart, nothing! Just a couple of clothes and faded jeans that I got in my old backpack. Nothing to lose, and nowhere else to go. And while I was about to embark in a beginning of a new journey, I became somewhat nostalgic.

Nostalgia

My father wanted me to be a farmer, being the eldest of three sons in a family that tends a sizable farmland in the province. So I went to an agricultural school for a year, but gave that up. Then by my mother's inspiration, I tried business management for a year. No good. I had interest in management, but the thought of staying indoors and spending the rest of my life sitting in my office slowly killed my interest. Those two frustrating years, however, revealed to me what was the matter. The ambition of my parent to put me into a profession, or if not, into business have influenced me against what I really wanted. I wanted to be free!. I needed to get away out of this seemingly unending monotony of my life out somewhere where I could be me.

I love adventure. My mother always tells me that I was like one of her brother who loves the thrill of the fights and adventures in the countryside. But apart from being physically strong and active on my feet, I had no other qualifications that I knew for leading an adventurous life. Nevertheless, It was adventure that called increasingly upon me.

Then I have been troubled by the rumblings of war between the Government forces and the Islamic separatist rebels of Mindanao. Now it was a fact, and being a reservist in the Armed forces, I was called to enlist for active military services. Christian by faith, and by my strong personal feelings against the moros, I joined the Army, to fight for my country and for my faith. I did not feel that I could not have made it a good soldier because there was something about a soldier's free life for adventure and danger that appealed to me. Still, with my country's split views over the issues of war that we are fighting for, and the ravaging scandals that stormed the leadership of the military, I feel like I was caught in between the devil and a deep cliff. So altogether, my dissatisfaction and unhappiness in my life drove me to undertake this long, painful and agonizing journey to the hinterland of Arabia.

The Departure

As I looked around me, I realized that I was the only person aboard the bus. In fact, even the driver was nowhere about. Then I turned my head around me and noticed few passerby's and some noctambulant vendors around the terminal. It's quite too early at 4 A.M. to ride. My flight is scheduled at 3 P.M. It took sometime until finally other passengers begin to arrived. Two passengers seated just behind me, weather beaten hard young men who were evidently recovering from a night of too close intimacy with liquor. I could smell the spirit coming out of their breath. Then there was a keen-eyed old man, and a buxom woman. they were apparently merchants. Another man had climbed to the driver's seat, and announced that the bus was about to leave. The last passenger who took the seat beside me was a salesman working in Makati.

As we were about to roll on the road, a a clamor of friendly voices arose bidding us goodbye. No doubt, some of the well-wishers actually know some of the passengers. But from the wave of sounds that arose, I could see that the departure of that bus was an event, and I seem to feel that some of the goodbyes and well-wishes ringing in my ears were actually meant for me.

And so the rest is history...

modest proposal

2009-09-22T01:06:00.001-07:00

some friends describes me as "simple't tahimik na pilyo at makulit".
i don't know why they say that
pero sabi nila ganun daw talaga ako,
"unstoppable" ang kakulitan at kapilyuhan. hindi halata, pero nakikita.well, i have something to share to you. it happened on my vacation last year.

naglalakad ako noon sa isang hindi gaanong kilalang shopping mall around filmore st. in makati papunta sa isang money changer ng maka encounter ko ang isang magandang promo gurl. kahit alam ko naman na merong money changer sa lugar na yun, naisipan kong magtanong sa magandang promo gurl just to start a conversation with her. matapos niyang maituro sa akin ang lugar, binigyan nya ako ng scratch-and-win promo coupon, na ikinatuwa ko naman dahil hahaba ang usapan namin. i then offered my modest proposal to her.
"ilang taon ka na miss?"
"19 po sir"
"may boyfriend?"
"wala sir, nag aaral pa po ako, kaya wala munang bf"
"ah, i see estudyante ka pala. how much are you getting from your job?"
"konti lang sir kasi part time lang po ako, may kaltas pa sa tax"
"maybe around ten thousand pesos?"
"wala po, maliit lang kasi part time lang ako"
"well then, i'll give you ten thousand pesos if you will spend a night with me"
"si sir naman, palabiro kayong masyado"
"i'm serious miss, ten thousand pesos in one night, hindi mo kikitain sa trabaho mo yan" i replied showing off to her some hundred dollar bills, and couple of thousand peso bills.
"ano naman gagawin natin sir?" she asked trying to keep her composure
"alam mo kadarating ko lang from abroad at sobrang na miss ko talaga ang mga happenings dito sa pinas. so gusto kong samahan mo ako, we'll dine and drink together, we'll have a party, we'll do enjoy the night together.what can you say?"
her cheeks then turned red as she blushed, which made her look prettier.
"ok miss, think about it then call me on this number once you're decided" i said after a while, gave her my contact number and leave...
wanna know wether she called me or not? abangan ang susunod kong post.

trapped

2009-09-22T01:03:00.001-07:00

Trapped

I'm trapped inside my love
I never will be freed
Of the pain I always have
Of this aching, biting need

It hurts because I miss you
And the pain will never cease
It will never let me forget my love
It never gives me peace.

I can't change the way I feel
I'll live with it instead
I loved you then, I love you now
I'll love you when I'm dead

Every time I see you
And look into your eyes
I see the gurl I'll always love
Hidden deep inside

This prison is my home
It's the only thing I see
It trapped me here, there's no escape
I can never be free!!!...

changes

2009-09-21T23:09:00.000-07:00

In every change that we experience in life, there will be times when we wonder if we can endure. but we must learn that facing each difficulty one by one isn't so hard. It's when you don't deal with a situation that it sometimes comes back and confront you again.
Changes are sometimes very painful, but they teach us that we can endure and that we can become stronger.

Everything that comes into our life has a purpose, but the outcome is in our hands by the actions we take.

Be wise with your life, be willing to endure, and always be willing to face life's challenges.

call me

2009-09-20T04:56:00.001-07:00

Call me CRAZY
That I love you
Even if loving you
Is just a fantasy

Call me STUPID
That I will wait for you
Even if waiting
Is still uncertain

Call me DUMB
That I feel for you
Even if feeling
Is just among my imagination

Call me LUNATIC
That I only want to hear
Your words against
Mine

Call me FOOLISH
That I loved you
Even if you miss out
A detail of our LOVE

fu8nny

2009-09-20T04:55:00.002-07:00

Funny...how humans long to be with people they love but refuse to admit it openly.
They are afraid to show even the slightest sign of affection because of fear.
Fear that their feelings may not be recognized or, even worse, unreturned...

But one thing about human beings that puzzles me the most is their conscious effort to be remotely connected with the object of their affection, even if it kills them slowly with in

rain

2009-09-20T04:55:00.001-07:00

My heart died.
How could I possibly be so incredibly stupid to live life as if waiting for someone or something that is not so certain will happen? LOVE? Did I crested so high on love that I've been so totally unmindful of my own self? I have given up everything...gave all though take nothing...all because of love

Rain starts to fall.
It was almost 29 lifeless years of seemingly unceasing outburst of heartaches, loneliness and awful pains... The raging drops of crystal-like water coming from that heavy gray clouds have been the sole mute witness of a love tale that ends without beginning. Memories, after all the shattering hopes and dreams should have merely expunged, but it lingered still.
Perhaps, I've been so ambitious. I choose to be blind to what should have been apparent from the very start. I can't help but love. Love with all of my heart. My heart was so paralyzed...

Rain pours so hard.
It's mesmeric lullaby as it now touches the rustling leaves of the trees, carries away the pains of me from within. The misty whispering winds drowned the warmth of tears on my face..Tears that stayed with me amidst all those sleepless nights when I was left burried so deep down the abyss of falling and staying so long in love.

I felt a sudden stab penetrated my very heart and it brought me back to my senses. Everything was just a mirage. At the back of my head is a lifetime wish that if only I could just stay frozen at this point of time without life passing me by, then maybe, love would be that precious piece I could keep with me forever. I found myself staring blankly ahead...so caught up with the magical speel that rain spread out. The self deserting petals leaving their thorns as light rain pampers their velvety touch makes them fall down to the murky ground, and there, they will stay...lying so still and quiet...until the enthralling beauty of sunshine will appear giving everyone a share of perfect serenity they all deserved...

I Love Rain...
It washes away the bitterness I feel!!...

never will i leave you

2009-09-20T04:52:00.002-07:00

Never will I Leave You...

You worry over how long
My love will truly last,
You know I have problems
With memories of my past.

Here I have a solution
One I think will do,
Use it when you wonder
How deeply I love you.

Whenever doubts come to your mind
And you're not sure how I feel,
In your mind just picture me
And the truth will be revealed.

For if you look close enough
You'll see here in my eyes,
The truth of my love for you
And then you'll realize.

If this doesn't work for you
Then in your mind just try,
Feel my hand taking yours
And hear my loving sigh.

Feel my fingers closing over
Your warm and supple hand,
Find the strength in my touch
And then you'll understand.

Just listen for my voice
Whispering in your ear,
You'll never be alone my love
For I am always near.

This love that I have for you
No matter what's in my past,
Is strong enough to get us through
This love I have will last.

Not only thru all time
And beyond all doubts we find,
Please allow this love to wipe out
All questions in your mind.

For never will I leave you
No other love would do,
The only woman I'll ever love
Is the one inside of you.

ron:)

love and commitment

2009-09-20T04:52:00.001-07:00

LOVE is a gift that anyone can have but COMMITMENT is a sacrifice for LOVE that not everyone is capable of, or willing to give...its just so sad that COMMITMENT is enclosed with duties and responsibilities for LOVE which makes it hard and heavy...duties and responsibilities which makes other people afraid of it, they may be ready for LOVE but not for a COMMITMENT...but come to think about it...isn't LOVE enough to keep a COMMITMENT?

special leaf

2009-09-20T04:50:00.000-07:00

One morning, a young man asked his father, " what is love?"
The father answered " Punta ka sa field then pitasin mo yung pinaka special na leaf na makikita mo." ....
Late afternoon, bumalik siya ngunit walang dalang leaf.......
Then the father asked him, "Nakita mo ba yung "special Leaf?"
He answered: " May nakita akong isang special leaf, but I didn't picked it up, dahil baka may makita pa ako na mas special pa kesa sa kanya, pero sa pag hahanap ko wala na akong nakita... kaya binalikan ko yung nakita kung special leaf before, pero pag balik ko wala na siya, kinuha na ng iba."

"We always try to look for the best but when we finally see it, we never recognized it was the best, and expecting to find a better one, madalas hindi natin yun pinapansin, not knowing it was the best...until the time we finally loose it."

Kaya ako, kung may makita ako, pipitasin ko na!...hirap tumandang binata noh!...

ron:)

destiny's bus

2009-09-20T04:49:00.001-07:00

Love is like someone waiting for a bus. When the bus comes, you look at it and you say to yourself...'eeeiii.. soo full.. cannot sit down. I'll wait for the next one."

So you let that bus go and wait for the second bus. The second bus comes...you look at it and you say, "eeeii...this bus is so old...so shabby! I cannot ride with this one"

So again you let the bus go and decide to wait for the next bus. Then the sky starts to get dark as it is getting late. You panic and jump immediately inside the next bus, it is not until much later that you found out that you had boarded the wrong bus!

So you wasted your time and money waiting for what you wanted!
and yet, you end up with the wrong one.......
Even if an airconditioned bus comes, you can't be sure that it won't break down or whether or not the airconditioner will be too cold for you, and will just make you sick....

So that means.. wanting to get what you want is wrong, But it wouldn't hurt if you give other people a chance, right? If you find that the bus doesn't suit you, just said "para po mama' " then just simply get-off..(pero magbayad ka muna hehehe)........

Hey! who said life is fair ? The best thing to do is be open and observant while you scrutinize the bus. If it doesn't suit you, get off. But you must always have an extra something which you could use for the next bus that comes..

But wait... I'm sure you've had this experience before. You saw a bus coming (the bus you want of course), you flagged at it but the driver acted as if he did not see you and zoomed past you!! with matching usok at alikabok!, this just made you frustrated, but think about it, It just wasn't meant for you..

The bottom line is.. being loved is like waiting for a bus you want. Getting on board the bus and appreciating the bus by giving it a chance depends totally on you. If you haven't made a choice..then WALK! Walking is like being out of love. The good side of it is you can still choose any bus you want.. the rest who couldn't afford another ride just have to be content with the bus they rode on...the same with those who cannot leave their partner..
they just have to be content with them, even though they do not feel in love with them anymore.....

One more thing.. sometimes it's better to choose a bus you are already familiar with rather than gamble with a bus that is unfamiliar to you. But then again... life wouldn't be complete without the risks involved. How will you know, if you will not try?...
sometimes, we need to take the risk, sometimes, we need to give someone a chance.....

But wait!... there's one more bus that i almost forgot to tell you about.... the bus that you don't have to wait for. It will just stop on its own, and will ask you come inside and take a ride for the rest of your life - it is named.. THE DESTINY's BUS.....

parang basketball

2009-09-20T04:48:00.000-07:00

...pag ibig...parang basketball...

dapat give and take ang laro. syempre,
one will win, one will lose,
ganon din naman sa love di ba?

laging merong nagmamahal ng nakahihigit sa pagmamahal ng isa.
at yung isa naman, laging humahabol.
minsan may fouls, kasi minsan nagkakasakitan na.

no relationship is perfect
kaya allowed ka hanggang 6 fouls.
kaso pag fouled out ka na,
kailangan mo ng humanap ng ibang kalaro.

masyado mo kasing 'hinaharass' yung kalaro mo.
ganun nga siguro talaga...

pag naghahanap ka naman
ng isang kalaro na ayaw makipaglaro sa yo,
para kang nagmamahal
sa isang tao na hindi ka naman mahal.

minsan meron naman dyan na isinasali ka
sa laro kahit ayaw mo, para kang hinahabol
ng isang tao na hindi mo naman mahal.

pero di ba mas mahirap
pag pareho niyong gustong maglaro
kaso di na pwede kasi yung isa sa inyo eh may kalaro na
o kaya pareho kayong may kalaro na?.

hay naku..

eh sino ba yung referee?
ahh.. yung mga kaibigan mo na
minsan pilit na pinaghihiwalay kayo.
swerte mo kapag kakampi mo yung referee.
kasi di ka niya tatawagan ng fouls.
kaso yung kalaro mo naman..
hurting inside na eh di mo pa alam.
ang hirap intindihin no?

complicated..

para nga talagang basketball.

pero siguro dapat natin tandaan..
wag na wag lilipat sa ibang court
habang naglalaro ka pa sa court mo.
mahirap mag double-play.
isa lang ang katawan mo.
mahirap maglaro sa dalawang court.
dapat stick to one court ka lang.
o di ba. mas maayos ang game?

hayy..

kailan kaya ako makakahanap ng kalaro
na di ako iiwanan sa gitna ng court?

my fears

2009-09-20T04:47:00.001-07:00

I feared being alone
until I learned to like
myself.

I feared failure
until I realized that I only
fail when I don't try.

I feared success
until I realized
that I had to try
in order to be happy
with myself.

I feared people's opinions
until I learned that
people would have opinions
about me anyway.

I feared rejection
until I learned to
have faith in myself.

I feared pain
until I learned that
it's necessary
for growth.

I feared the truth
until I saw the
ugliness in lies.

I feared life
until I experienced
its beauty.

I feared death
until I realized that it's
not an end, but a beginning.

I feared my destiny,
until I realized that
I had the power to change
my life.

I feared hate
until I saw that it
was nothing more than
ignorance.

I feared love
until it touched my heart,
making the darkness fade
into endless sunny days.

I feared ridicule
until I learned how
to laugh at myself.

I feared growing old
until I realized that
I gained wisdom every day.

I feared the future
until I realized that
life just kept getting
better.

I feared the past
until I realized that
it could no longer hurt me.

I feared the dark
until I saw the beauty
of the starlight.

I feared the light
until I learned that the
truth would give me
strength.

I feared change,
until I saw that
even the most beautiful butterfly
had to undergo a metamorphosis
before it could fly

because of you

2009-09-20T04:46:00.001-07:00

Because of You

Each day I wake and see you there,
I watch you breathe and stroke your hair.
You rustle oh so peacefully,
for somehow you can sense it's me.

Slip out of bed, and have my cup,
of coffee trying to wake up.
Down to the den to my old chair,
and ponder while I'm sitting there.

Why has my life so changed with you?
My every hope and dream come true.
Simple fate or just pure chance?
I don't believe in happenstance.

A greater power, much stronger than,
any power known to man.
Has brought me you, down from the sky.
and to this day I don't know why.

But "Because of You" I feel complete,
a happiness I can't retreat.
You've brought new meaning to my life,
I hope that you will be my Wife.

You make me proud, by compliment,
my smallest task or non-event.
A man should feel this way I sense,
yet so few do in self defense.

Much wasted time has passed before,
in days an empty pointless score.
But "Because of You" and all you give,
I now have purpose, Now I live.

My vow to you oh Princess Dear,
to love your soul each night and day.
Not take for granted your gift of love,
forsake reward from God above.

Forever thankful through and through,
a blessed man, "Because of You"

"To Loose you is to Never Love Again"....

angel

2009-09-20T04:45:00.001-07:00

Angel

On weary wings I take my flight
To lofty cloudy streaked sky.
Higher into star-filled night
My burdened soul did fly.

Below me now I see the waves
That crash upon the sand.
They seem to me as helpless slaves
Of Neptune's ocean hand.

I think of how I seem to be
A slave in that same way.
With tear stained cheeks
I clearly see the price that I must pay.

And then amidst my sorrow still
I plant my thoughts on you,
And sunshine fills the darkened sky
Birthing it anew.

Water glistens. Gulls fly
In skies now warm and bright,
And suddenly I realize
That you are the source of light.

I watch as still you brighter grow
And cast your light askew.
All at once the heavens glow
With a light that I call "YOU".

I watch a rosebud open up
To drink your beams of love.
Its tender petals spread to sup
The warmth cast from above.

A smile emerges upon my face
As then it dawns on me
That I can bask in an angel's grace.
It is she who set me free.

So my angel, take your flight
Into my life undone.
Mend the pieces of my broken heart,
And make them whole, as one.

Oh my angel, you are to me
A beacon in the night.
A shining star for me to see.
So guide me by your light.

Just love me angel. Be so true.
Stay strong and never sway,
And all my life I'll look after you
And love you every day...

love or success

2009-09-20T04:43:00.000-07:00

"Giving someone all your love is never an assurance that they will love you back. Don't expect love in return, just wait for it to grow in their heart but if it doesn't, be content enough that it grew in yours."

Last May 2007 I and my ex GF Elaine broke up...It isn't because we didn't love each other anymore, but mainly because we have to prioritize one thing...the FUTURE... just like any other professionals, we are giving much importance on our career...and most of the time LOVE and CAREER clash...we cannot be a servant of two masters, we must give up one aspect of our life, so we can focus on the more important aspect...and while we are doing our best to be successfull in our lives...

This is what I learned from that break up...

Everyone wants success; yet, we often don't know when we have it. For most, success is the desire for a ''better life'', or more quantities or richness; however, success is not much on material wealth. It is not to be sought in the outside world, but discovered within. It is kindness shared, support given, and love sought. Success matters most when pain enters our lives. Pain hurts; yet, we must remember that when tears are on the outside, healing is on the inside. Success will take us where we want to go; however, the designated driver of success lies somewhere hidden deep in the mysteries of love...

We can hide the pain that you feel and make others believe that we can move on. But we can never deny the truth to ourselves that the person who has failed us and hurt us the most is still the person we’ll always choose to love...and sometimes the hardest thing we have to do is the best thing for us.

As my ex once said "Love is like a butterfly, the more you chase it, the more it eludes you, but if you are calm and still it will land in you lap at a time you never expect it..."

Now, I have found a new love...I never expected she would come...I never ask for her to come, but she did....

how to appease your partner

2009-09-20T04:37:00.002-07:00

sumtimes we forget that our partner are also our frens.. we forget to be korni and kikay/kikoy to them.. forget to say thank you.. sorry.. pls..or just any sweet nothings that will somehow appease them.

but then again, it is true, we also gotta be tactical with our words.. diplomatic with the things we say if we want PEACE and lasting happiness...hehehehe!!

In order to have a moment of serenity.. a small gesture will get u a long way... a minute of effort.. will bring u great joy..so may as well..

so.. an advise to my fellow machos.. go out and play with ur gurl.. just say a few sweet little nothings to her... update her on ur whereabouts.. call her occasionally.. SMS them just to say Hi!.. and then when HOME...tell them you're HOME...little korni things...but will have a great result...and your relationship will bloom

advise to felines out there...go out play with your guy.. learn the art of teasing your man..hehehe.. ur bf wana go to pub.. or ktv or disco sometimes.. let them go without a NAG... update them when u leave office or home.. reach dinner place...treat them for lunch sometimes...update on the songs they're playing.. update them on who is there with u ... and tell them u MISS them....

...little childish act that will be of great help for the relationships to truly flourish...

just banish

2009-09-20T04:37:00.001-07:00

Why a beautiful thing must be left with goodbye
That even heaven weep above the sky?
Why have to end the happy moments
Of a young heart that's fulfilled with thy scents?

Why there is love when not in time?
Far from dreams of life's prime.
Why sacrifice, why pain, why hurt?
Sentimental feelings that kill one's heart.

Why not endless when with you?
Forever in my arms I'll craddle you.
Why there is you and just a dream?
Only can be real when dreams are all gone.

Why have to go, why not stay?
Why so many why's in this life to cherish?
That when you leave,
The answers just vanish?...

ron:)

letting go

2009-09-20T04:32:00.000-07:00

People don't let go because they get something out of it, whether its negative or positive. The thing or the person you are attached to fulfills a need. And the fulfillment arrived from the attachment is stronger than the motivation to let go.

Letting go does not mean losing or having to give something up. Letting go is simply making a decision-- no longer to allow something from the past to influence your life now or to reduce your inner sense of peace and well being. Holding on causes tension and restricts freedom. All we need to do is to let go of the beliefs and attitudes that prevent us from experiencing the joy of the moment. Clinging on to something-- whether its an emotion, a relationship, a person, or a belief prevents us from being in the here and the now.

Ron:)

all about my wife

2009-09-20T04:28:00.000-07:00

This is all about my wife. How i want her to be ..

She would be one of simplicity.
She would not be a queen or a king's daughter but a woman of feminity.
She would not be rich but have a heart of gold
She will be kind enough to feed another person's hunger.
She is someone whose eyes will only see me as a man
She is classy in her way and yeilds power within her fingertips
She will be full of shyness and culture will bound her.
Her great traditions will rule her and she will be a woman of patience, love, kindness, and heart.
Her arrogance will be my pride.
Her beauty will be my asset.
Her heart will be my mine
Her love will be my breath

and below is about my bride....

Her lotus like face will encover her beauty as a veil
Her slim and slender fingers would make her rings slip and fall
The sound of her glass bangles would ring my attention
The anklets on her feet would announce her presence
Her red silk saree which drapes her will move her
The jasmine flowers on her scenting hair will make even bees not to drink the honey from them
Her diamond nose stud will shine as though it was where light originated from.
Her henna on her hands would spell her love for me.
My bride will come as a flower who bloomed in the garden of beauty in the mt. of happiness
Any other women would envy her.
Her tumeric face facing the floor as she arrives at my door.
Knocking over the pot of rice, bringing in good luck to my household, as she arrives in..with her right feet over, her head will stand strong and up.
She will be the empress of my heart, the queen of my household, the angel of my life.
My wife, my long awaited Radha of my Empire...

Who will she be?...

ron...

divine connection

2009-09-20T04:17:00.000-07:00

A perfect partner in life is someone who can be with you and talk about anything without realizing that the day was over...

Someone who will always listen and feel twice the joy you feel or the pain you're going through...

When you start to feel that "DIVINE CONNECTION" between you, never let it GO!..for there is more to companionship than to love alone....

In the end, when all else fails and are consumed, you will always hold on to those times when you don't even need to say or hear the wrds "I LOVE YOU!"..

tears

2009-09-20T04:10:00.000-07:00

"Real tears are not those that fall
from the eyes and covers the face,
but those that fall from the heart and
covers the soul".

stupid emotions

2009-09-20T04:07:00.000-07:00

There's a love inside me,
that seems to stay forever.
I don't wanna be like this,
I know I can go yet I wanna stay.

A matter of choice
which I played for years.
Havin' thoughts to choose
what's the best for me.

Yet It's hounting me,
where I can subtend my feelings?

Im overjoyed, but suppressed by sorrow.
Wishing someone could save me, from here.
Questions leaving my head,
"when can I go home?"
And hoping to be love again.

My eyes are not open,
'cos Im scared to see the reality.
That I can't bring my past,
and try things one more time.

Loving her is the most
selfish thing that I've ever made,
For myself.
And I couldn't take the blame on her,
not on her but me.

Im overjoyed but suppress by tears.
I know I should be over,
over from her.
Fears keep taunting me,
that's why I can't go home.

Scared to see and feel,
that I can't be loved again.

Im over joy but suppress by fears.
Rain had stopped but the dark clouds keeps waitin' for more.
Winds keeps crashing around the shadows of love.
and still I can't go home, to see and feel.
that I can love again..

ron:)

messing around

2009-09-20T04:03:00.000-07:00

Human as we are, we make mistakes that we never desired to happen. When people came to judge us...however...thank you!! it simply shows the imperfection of this world and that we need to equip ourselves for more predicaments that would come........

though we strive for our goals...not everybody realized it...however, we strive more to reach it!! and i know that somewhere,somehow in the future-we would!!!

ron:)

for the last time

2009-09-20T03:59:00.001-07:00

For The Last Time...

The first time I fell in love was long ago.
I didn't know how to give my love at all.
The next time, I settled for what felt so close.
But without love, you'll gonna fall.
After everything I've learned;
Now it's finally my turn.
This is the last time I'll fall...in love.
The first time we talked and listen to our songs, the moment when everything became clear.
I didn't need to ask or even wonder why, because each question is answered when your near.
and I'm wise enough to know when a miracle unfolds, this is the last time i'll fall in love.
Now don't hold back, just let me know.
Am I moving much too fast or way too slow.
'Cause all of my life, I've waited for you.
To find that once in a lifetime, this is it, I'll never be the same.
You'll never know what it's taken me to say these words.
And now that I've said them, they could never be enough.
As far as I can see, there's only YOU and ME.

This is the last time I'll fall in love

I LOVE YOU! More than you know.

Ron:)

wala lang

2009-09-20T03:57:00.000-07:00

"Sometimes we need to take the risk to achieve what we want...And make mistakes to know where the right things is"

definition of love

2009-09-20T03:47:00.000-07:00

philospical definition of LOVE...

Love doesn't need dates, treats, gifts, money or extreme kissin to realize that ur finally in love.
It only needs the comfort and security of having a lifetime friend in the person.
If despite all the consequences, the feeling does not die out, instead it grows stronger. It must be it.

usapang ulam

2009-09-20T03:41:00.001-07:00

kumbaga sa pagkain, ang asawa ay isang espesyal at masarap na putahe na tanging ikaw lang ang puwedeng tumikim (hindi puwede ang iba, or else magkaka katayan). subalit espesyal man daw at masarap, kung araw araw mong pinapapak ay mauumay at magsasawa ka rin at minsan ay hahanapin ng iyong panlasa ang ibang mga exotic na ulam tulad ng sardinas,bagoong, kangkong, tuyo at galunggong...
"poor man's dishes"
one time lang, sawa ka na agad. pampa tanggal lang ng umay, 'ika nga nila...

a friend asked me minsang kumakain kami sa isang sikat na restaurant sa manama, bahrain.
"r0n, ang ganda ganda na ng asawa mo pare, pero bakit nagawa mo pang mambabae noong ikaw ay nagbakasyon? bakit pare?"
i told him "pare, parang ulam natin, masarap ang crispy tenderloin dipped in honey lemon sauce, with garden fresh salad in garlic-mayo toppings. di ba napapadami ang kain mo? pero nakaka umay din yan kapag madalas...kaya minsan di ba, naghahanap ka ng sardinas?...nagsawa ang panlasa ko sa sinigang na sugpo noon, kaya tumikim ako ng paksiw na galunggong. pero isinuka ko rin kasi "bilasa" na pala, hindi na siya fresh. sumakit lang ang tiyan ko...

well, hindi ako
"baleng" para ipagpalit ang bacon sa "bagoong". side dish lang un, "taste enhancer" kumbaga. katulad sa pag aasawa, magkakagulo kapag "tumikim" ka ng iba. parang bacon na iginisa sa bagoong, hindi match di ba? at siguradong sira ang timpla, papangit ang lasa...pero kapag naayos na ang problema, the relationship will become stronger and better than it was before:). parang ulam na muling sumasarap kapag ininit at tinimplahan ulit...but wait! nasabi ko na ba na mas bagay ang bagoong sa kangkong?...hindi sa bacon:]
perfect match sila, di ba? "bagoong at kangkong"...ang mahal nga sa chowking nun eh,
"exotic match", amoy na kumakapit at lasang uhhmm, nameeet!.."finger licking good". solve na solve ka talaga! pero side dish lang, hindi puwedeng maging main dish kasi kulang sa sustansya. katulad sa buhay may asawa, minsan merong mga taong pang side dish lang din. iyong mga nakikihati sa oras pagmamahal at atensiyon na dapat nauukol sa iba. enjoy kang kasama sila dahil gagawin nila ang lahat lahat para ma-satisfy ka, pero hindi ka magiging maaligaya dahil kulang sa tunay na sustansiya.
"kulang sa pagmamahal". libog lang yan! ika nga ng isang kaibigan kong balahura.

eh nakatikim na ba kayo ng "burong kapampangan"? alam nyo ba na panis na kanin yun, pinabulok kasama ang mga ingredients nya (isda, hipon o alamang) at kapag bulok na saka igigisa sa taba ng karneng baboy. OMG! promise para kang kumakain ng suka ng palaka, pero mabango at masarap siya kung "one time" lang titikman. pag inulit mo pa maduduwal ka na. lalo na yung burong kapampangan na made in mindoro, mabango at masarap kung isang beses lang titikman, pero nakakaduwal na pag uulitin mo pa.

paano daw naging related ang asawa sa ulam?...

wala lang:)

eh ang bagoong at kangkong?...

sila yun...

belong...

2009-09-20T03:03:00.000-07:00

"We have to forget about some people from our past because of one simple reason...they just don't belong..in our future"

"bpatient"

2009-09-20T02:54:00.000-07:00

We all suffer from one pain or the other but what we fail to understand is that pains always disciplines us. There are always better things in life, we just have to be patient."

ron:)

You must not Quit...

2008-10-31T21:26:00.000-07:00

You Must not Quit

When things go wrong as they sometimes will
When the road you are trudging seems an uphill
When the funds are low and the debts are high
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh

When care is pressing you down a bit
Rest, if you must but never quit!
Life is queer with it's twist and turns
As everyone of us sometimes learns
And many failures turns about
When we might have won, had we stuck it out?

Dont give up though the pace seems slow
You may succed with another blow
Success is failure turn inside out
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt

And you never can tell how close you are
It maybe near when it seems so far
So, stick to the fight when you're hardest hit
It's when things seems worst that you must not quit!

While Papa is Away...By Ivan Dayle Rafer

2008-10-31T21:21:00.000-07:00

I just want to share it here...A poem composed by my 7 year old son, grade 1 pupil at Bautista Elementary School in Labo Camarines Norte.
He composed this poem, and wins the first prize for their United Nations program in the School:)

While Papa is Away

Papa left us to work abroad
Mama is here to care for us
They decided to live away from each other
Because they want the best for us..

I know that thousands of children are like us
With mother or father laboring in foreign lands
We all feel sad but there seems no choice
We simply have to accept things the way they are..

Now that Papa is thousand of miles away from us
I cannot but call on you
So while he is away from us
You do the caring and the comforting..

As to mama, we will make life easier for her
We will follow as she wishes us to do
So that when papa finally comes home
We'll be happy again under one roof...

Ivan Dayle Quimada Rafer
Grade I-A
Bautista Elementary School

Proud Daddy Ron:)

Ivan dayle is really smart and intelligent boy...mana sa mommy niya (partly...but mostly siyempre sa daddy)...
Class president, school representative/contestant for science and math quiz bee sa region 5, And he is the youngest ever to become officer of their school's student body...he became SBO councilor at the age of 5...and until now, he is still an SBO councilor...

Positive Responses....

2007-12-22T08:11:00.001-08:00

This is in response to the criticism of my dear sister Irene, about my blogs....bakit daw puro negative write ups ang naka post dito....
what she fails to see is the message behind each write ups I post here...mukhang negative kung pagbabasihan mo ang bawat salitang ginamit ko sa pagbuo ng bawat linya....but if you look deeper into the whole article, you'll see it's substance, at masasabi mo na maganda pala ang aral na nais iparating ng writer...kaya para sa ate ko, read my write ups...in it's fullest sense....

This one is for you, Ate Irene...

Positive Responses

The best response to a negative
experience is to create a positive
experience, out of it. Instead of fighting
against life's misfortunes, transform
them into useful and worthwhile
value.

When things go wrong, you have a
choice. You can wallow in self pity or
you can seize the opportunity for self
improvement.

In every disappointment there is the
seed of fulfillment. In every
weakness there is the seed of
strength.

Problems and difficulties provide
reliable pathways to achievement.
There is value to be gained from every
experience when you choose to see that
value and to bring it about.

You never have to be the victim of
random circumstance, or of any other
circumstance for that matter.
For instead of choosing to be the
victim, you can always choose to make
a positive difference.

Life is often unfair, and comes to you
in ups and downs, but that doesn't
really matter.
For you are free to make of it
whatever you choose.

Ron:)
Abqaiq, KSA

Wonderful Melodies

2007-11-06T09:03:00.000-08:00

A Poem Dedicated for ALL Overseas Filipino Workers..

WONDERFUL MELODIES

The day is done, and the darkness
Falls from the wings of the Night,
As a feather is wafted downward
From an Eagle in his flight.

I see the lights of the village
Gleam through the rain and the mist,
And a feeling of sadness comes over me,
That my soul cannot resist;

A feeling of sadness and longing,
That is not akin to pain,
And resembles sorrow only
As the mist resembles the rain.

Come, read to me some poem,
Some simple and heartfelt lay,
That shall soothe this restless feeling,
And banish the thoughts of day.

Not from the grand old masters,
Not from the bards sublime,
Whose distant footsteps echo
Through the corridors of Time.

For, like strains of martial music,
Their mighty thoughts suggest
Life's endless toil and endeavour;
And tonight I long for rest.

Read from some humble poet,
Whose songs gushed from his heart,
As showers from the clouds of summer,
Or tears from the eyelids start;

Who through long days of labor,
And nights devoid of ease,
Still hear in his soul the music
Of wonderful melodies.

Such songs have power to quiet
The restless pulse of care,
And come like the benediction
That follows after prayer.

Then read from the treasured volume
The poem of thy choice,
And lend to the rhyme of the poet
The beauty of thy voice.

And the night shall be filled with music,
And the cares that infest the day
Shall fold their tents like the Arabs,
And silently steal away...

Mobile Phone

2007-11-05T08:21:00.000-08:00

I was writing something when my mobile phone rang...missed call....from someone who have been a special part of my life...maybe she's thinking of me...maybe she missed me...I dunno...All I know is that...our story is like our mobile phones...

She simply doesn’t care about her PHONE:
That, she could live even without it
That, she could forget and simply leave it on her house
That, she doesn’t care if she does leave it
That, for her, “to hell with that phone!
Anyway I know I own it I could just simply get it anytime I want to.
That I know no one will get it. i hate his phone…i do hate it!

Why can’t she be just like before?!
Just like I do.

I love my phone so much, proudly 7650 nokia user (hehehe)
That I can’t even bear to left it at home and if I do I go back and get it!
That’s how important my phone is.

Every time I woke up...
Very excited to look on it, to read a new message…
Honestly expecting a message coming from someone so dear to me.
But I guess she is still sleeping at 8am or nine at her timezone...
No messages! No miscalls! No greetings! Too sad! Poor Dear phone!

Ever time I go out, go to office or go somewhere
I always do have my dear phone with me… so close yet…
Necessary! - Very important with me!
It’s like I can’t go on duty because I’m lacking paraphernalia.
It’s like I can’t carry on my job because I don’t have permit.
It’s like driving a car without gasoline.
It’s like wearing my beautiful shoes but no one could appreciate... (Connected bah?...heheheh)

All I know……
I treasure it badly….
I always think about it….
I can’t bear to leave it and to simply forget it.

That, I love my phone so much….
And that's how important she is to me…
That was before....

Coz sadly, I’m just like her phone....worthless to her... Too sad…very bad!

Ron:)
Abqaiq, KSA

Oh aking Anak!...

2007-11-03T10:38:00.001-07:00

Oh aking anak, sa aking pagtanda
Unawain mo sana at pagpasensiyahan ako...

Kung matapon ko ang sabaw sa hapag kainan
O kaya'y makabasag ako ng pinggan
Huwag mo sana akong kagagalitan
Dahil lang yun sa kalabuan ng aking mga mata
at kahinaan ng aking katawan

Kung pinagagalitan man kita
Sa mga baso at pinggang iyong nabasag noong bata ka pa
Iyon ay dahil sa ayaw kong masusugatan ka...

Kung ang mga salitang sinasabi mo ay di ko naiintindihan at di naririnig
Huwag mo sana akong pagsasabihan ng "Bingi"
Mahina na talaga ang aking pandinig
Pakiulit na lang ng malakas-lakas
Hindi naman kailangang ako'y iyong sigawan
Upang tayo ay magkaunawaan...

Kung mabagal na akong maglakad ngayon
at hindi na makasabay sa iyong bilis at liksi
Pakihintay mo lang at alalayan sana ako
Katulad ng pag alalay ko sayo
Noong nag aaral ka pa lang maglakad
Habang tuwang tuwa akong pinag mamasdan ka...

Kung minsan na nagiging makulit ako
At parang sirang plakang paulit ulit ang mga salitang sinasabi ko
Huwag mo sana akong pagtawanan at kainisan
Gnayan ka rin kakulit noong bata ka pa
At nag iiyak ka pa kung hindi kita pinakikinggan
at hindi mo ako tinitigilan hangga't ang nais mo'y hindi nakakamtan...

Kung sakali mang knatatamaran ko na ngayon
Ang paglilinis sa aking katawan
At hindi na naliligo kahit ako'y amoy lupa na
Huwag mo sana akong pandirihan at piliting paliguan
Mahina na kasi ang aking katawan kapag ako'y nalalamigan...

Natatandaan mo pa ba noong bata ka pa?
Kahit ang dungis mo ay masaya kitang hinahalikan?
At matiyagang hahabulibn sa ilalim ng kama upang paliguan?

Kung palagi man akong nagsusungit at nagsisigaw
Iyon ay dala ng pagkainip sa loob ng bahay
At pagkadismaya na wala ng silbi pa ang aking buhay
Ipadama mo lang sana na may halaga pa rin ako sa iyong mundo
Katulad ng pagpapahalaga at pagpapadama ko sa iyo noon
at pagtutuwid ko sa mga pagkakamali at katigasan ng iyong ulo...

Kung may konti ka pang panahon
Magkuwentuhan naman tayo...

Sabik na sabik akong makausap ka
Subalit alam kong busy ka
Sa trabaho at sa mga gawaing bahay
Kaya't wala ka ng panahon para sa akin

Gusto kong malaman mong hinahanap hanap ko ang mga kuwento mo
At interesado pa rin akong makinig sayo
Katulad ng pagkukuwento mo noong bata ka pa
At tuwang tuwa akong pinakikinggan ka
Habang pautal utal kang nagkukuwento tungkol sa mga bagong kaibigan mo sa school

Kung ako man ay maihi at madumi
Dahil hindi na makabangon sa higaan
Huwag mo sana akong kagalitan at pandirihan
Katulad ng walang reklamo kong paggising sa gabi
At kahit anong pagod ay walang sawang titiisin ang antok
Upang linisin ang dumi at palitan ang iyong lampin
Huwag lang masira ang tulog mo
HIndi na baleng ako ang mapuyat
At makagalitan ng boss ko dahil aantok antok sa trabaho...

At kung ako'y maratay na sa banig ng karamdaman
Huwag mo sana akong pagsawaang alagaan
Gaya ng matiyaga kong pagaalaga sayo noong musmos ka pa lang
Bawat daing mo'y hirap na dinadala sa aking kalooban
Pagtiyagaan mo sana akong alagaan sa mga huling sandali ng aking buhay
Sapagkat ako naman ay hindi na magtatagal...

At kung dumating na ang aking takdang panahon
At ako'y haharap na sa dakilang lumikha
Ibubulong ko at hihilingin sa kanya
Na pagpalain ka niya, Oh aking anak!...
Dahil naging mapagmahal at maalaga ka...
Sa iyong mga magulang!...

Ron:)
Abqaiq, KSA

Patuloy Akong Maglalakbay

2007-11-03T10:04:00.000-07:00

Habang ang aking mga paa'y walang kapagalan
Habang may dugong nananalaytay sa aking ugat at nagbibigay init sa aking pakiramdam
Habang malinaw pa ang aking paningin
Habang matalas pa ang aking isipan
Patuloy akong maglalakbay
Patuloy akong hahakbang patungo sa aking walang katiyakang destinasyon

Habang may natatanaw pa akong sikat ng araw
Habang may liwanag ng buwang tumatanglaw sa aking landas sa dilim ng gabi
Habang may simoy ng hanging dumadapyo upang pawiin ang pagkapagal ng aking katawan
Habang may mga puno akong nasisilungan
Patuloy akong maglalakbay
Patuloy akong hahakbang patungo sa aking walang katiyakang destinasyon

Habang sa akin ay may umaasa
Habang sa akin ay may naghahanap ng kasagutan sa kanilang mga tanong
Habang may sumasandig sa aking mga balikat
Habang may nais pang maniwala at magtiwala sa akin
Patuloy akong maglalakbay
Patuloy akong hahakbang patungo sa aking walang katiyakang destinasyon

Habang ako ay naniniwalang may puwersang higit na makapangyarihan kesa sa kalikasan
Habang ako ay nananampalatayang may isang tagapaglikhang nagbibigay ng buhay sa lahat ng nilalang
Habang ako ay naniniwalang siya lang ang tanging gabay ng lahat niyang nilikha
Patuloy akong maglalakbay
Patuloy akong hahakbang patungo sa aking walang katiyakang destinasyon

Dahil ang buhay ay patuloy na pakikibaka
Dahil ang buhay ay patuloy na pagharap sa mga hamon
Dahil ang buhay ay patuloy na pagsalunga sa agos
Dahil ang buhay ay patuloy na paglalakbay
Patungo sa isang walang katiyakang destinasyon

Pero habang may Bathalang patuloy na umaalalay at gumagabay sa aking paglalakbay
Patungo sa aking walang katiyakang destinasyon
Ang kasagutan ay nasa aking mga kamay
Kaya't patuloy akong maglalakbay...

ron:)
Abqaiq, KSA

DREAM STEALERS

2007-11-01T00:42:00.000-07:00

"Guys, is there a certain point in your life when you experience that following the advice of those people around you was the main reason why you were not able to achieve your goal?"

DREAM STEALERS!..

Throughout my life, my friends and folks have offered me advice.
And though they meant the best for me, they sometimes wasn't nice.
They would always say my plans were just another crazy schemes.
And every time I listened, I let them steal my dreams.

I guess they feared, in case I failed, that I really shouldn't try.
So I would never spread my wings and never learned to fly.
But they're just folks who only see the world the way it seems,
and I am no longer going to let those people steal my dreams.

I know that there are many people out there that want to do much more.
Deep down, they know that they're capable of reaching beyond their goals.
But sadly it's the mediocre minds that bring them right back down.
And when they're down, they leave them stumble to the ground

I just want to tell you people to go after your dreams!
Don't let those dream stealers bring you down..
AIM HIGH!...BELIEVE THAT YOU CAN!...NEVER HESITATE!...
GO AFTER YOUR DREAMS!...SPREAD YOUR WINGS AND SOAR UP HIGH!...

ron:)

The Final Moments

2007-11-01T00:41:00.000-07:00

I do not know how to start this story that drastically changed my life. Frankly, I hesitated to about divulging it at first. However, when I saw your replies on my post at asmsi.or.ph about my putting my faith into perspective, and embraced ISLAM, and out of my feeling of fear of GOD, I decided to again get hold of my pen and start scribbling what my heart wants to say.

Vehicular accident is among the highest rating cause of death in The Middle East. I myself, have winessed three particularly bad accidents and have been involved in the fourth one.
The first time involved two men whom I, being among the first to arrived in the crash site, helped pull them out of the car in the state of semi consciousness. The Policemen who arrived after a couple of minutes, knowing that the these two men are definitly dying, repeatedly asked them to to pronounce the "SHAHADA" or the witness of Allah as the one true God, and Mohammd as his prophet. Sadly, all they did was to blab about their work and worry about everything until they were exhausted and finally died.

The second, which happened quite sometime later involved a young man who was repairing his tire. While doing so, he was badly hit by a speeding car-when we saw him, his clothes were covered with blood, his limbs were almost torn apart, and we are certain that he is going to die. When the Police pick him up to bring him to the Hospital, we were surprised to hear him raised his voice and sung verses from the Holy Qur'an... The voice reciting verses from the Holy Qur'an!...We couldn't believe that a dying man could have a voice so beautifulthat it was almost Angelic. Just as the rescuers fixed hi inside the Ambulance, he lifted up his right index finger and pronounced the "SHAHADA" in a loud voice afterwhich he died.

The third leaves a clear picture in my mind up to this time. A friend of mine went out to buy food for our dinner. Four hours had passedand he did not return, that I started to get worried about him. So I rode my car and went around looking for him. On my way, I saw a car that was involved in an accident, it was turned over on it's side while flames were shooting over of it.

Getting nearer to the crash site, I was shocked to discover that it was my friends car, So I ran like hell trying to save him from the burning car. I found out that half of his body was charred and some of his flesh were melting and falling freely to the ground while he was still alive. I helped pull him out and laid him on the side of the road. within minutes, he opened his eyes and shouted: THE FIRE!!!...THE FIRE!!!... I talked to him trying to soothe his agony and promised him that I would bring him to the nearrest hospital as quickly as I could, but he refused and replied in a weak crying voice " It's no use now, I couldn't make it there"... Tears blurred my vision....My friend is dying in my lap and I can do nothing to help him, while some part of his body is being consumed by fire yet he is still alive... Suddenly he shouted: "WHAT SHALL I TELL HIM!....WHAT SHALL I TELL HIM!... so I asked him, "What will you tell whom?... Then he replied in a deep far away voice: "ALLAH"... Panic struck me when suddenly he let out a long sigh, afterwhich he died... The picture of that scene never left my mind...My dying friendburning up while shrieking "What shall I tell him?"...It keeps me awake all night while I was lying in my bed with the picture of my dying friend on my mind.

It never entered my mind that I would be the next victim...when one morning, while on my way to my work, I suddenly fall asleep while my car is running at a tremendous speed (about 160-180kph which is normal in KSA) I was awakened only when I hit something on the road. My car flew about 50 meters away from the crash site, and rolled over for five or six times. I thought of it as my final moment, and the last word that I utter was " My GOD, please take care of my soul"...I felt something hot struck my face, and I saw a flashing of bright light, afterwhich, I lost my consciousness. I dont know how long have I been in the car, but when I opened my eyes again, I was in the Hospital being treated for some few bruises which I got from the crash.
Everyone was surprised to see me alive with only few small bruises, while my car was a picture of a complete wreckage. I myself cannot believe that I am alive...but I believe, it is the will of GOD..

As I recall on my mind the three previous accidents that I have witnessed, and the one which I was involved, I realized that "THE FINAL MOMENTS" of the human being are probably the most important ones. If he was a good and pious believer, then he will be able to die calling the name of God, Otherwise he will be preoccupied with whatever earthly business that was preventing him from performing his duty towards God. When I came out of the Hospital, I go instead to prison, but I never regret it..It was there in prison that I heard the calling, when the IMAM, commencing the " Salatul Fajr" or prayer at dawn, sung an Arabic Phrase which means "COME HITHER TO THE RIGHT PATH AND PERFORM THE GOOD DEEDS"... I felt as if the caller was addressing me alone, calling for me to abandon my way of life, to close the curtain of the dark chapter of my life, and to start a new one following the path of guidance and light. That was then that i perform the "Ghusl" (cleansing ritual) to cleanse my body from the stains of my past, and I turned to Allah for repentance to cleanse my soul...And finally pronounced the "SHAHADA" for the first time in my life. Now, I always thanked and praise ALLAH, no one else deserves to be praised and thanked. From that point onward in my life, I am a changed person. I have always performed my religious duties and also planning to do "UMRAH" and "HAJJ" (pilgrimage to Makkah)...

WHO KNOWS WHEN I MIGHT DIE?

SUICIDAL

2007-11-01T00:23:00.000-07:00

By this time I knew I was depressed.
As I sit in my office cubicle wondering what I was going to do and what was going to happen next...

.....I turn my head and see an object on a desk --
It makes me think of something else, and it in turn something else, ballooning into thoughts of global proportion..... .
....thoughts connecting from a cutter blade on a desk into a worldwide problem of universal doom.
In my mind's eye I see the world as hopeless...
the problems overwhelming...
change is insurmountable...
the whole of life as futile...
Hopelessness to Infinity...

.....My mind and heart are squeezed for their juices
vacillating between thought and feeling,
and feeling and thought
thoughts rebounding off feelings of sorrow.....

My mind searching for answers...
My heart is still....
The realization is solemn and deep: My life is over...
My death must occur...

There is no hope...
My heart is torn apart...
My tears overflowing..

How can I live ?...
...How can I die ?...
......How can I leave ?...

Will I know that I've hurt them ?
Will I know how they feel ?
I feel sorrow for them...
I feel sorrow for me...

Those whom I love ...
Those who loves me...

CALL ME

2007-10-30T13:08:00.000-07:00

Sino Ba?

2007-10-30T12:15:00.000-07:00

"I'd rather be a fool with a broken heart than be someone who never had a part of you."

Bakit kaya minsan ang sarap magmahal kahit walang kapalit?
naisip mo na ba iyon?
akala mo okey lang... kahit sobrang hirap...
Masarap magmahal hindi ba?
Kahit ikaw, hindi ka sigurado sa pag ibig ng taong mahal na mahal mo...
Minsan iniisip mo nalang na pagdating ng tamang panahon magiging maayos din ang lahat... Sana nga!
Nang hindi ka naman mukhang tanga sa kaka asa sa kanya sa wala...
Minsan din ang sarap sarap isipin na minamahal ka ng taong mahal mo! yung tipong kayo na lang sana at hindi ang mga nakikita mong kasama nya na masaya at akala ang buong mundo ay kanilang kanila...
Minsan din ang sarap bumalik sa nakaraan...
Yung tipong masaya pa kayo, parang mga batang walang problema...
Kung meron man parang, against all odds ang settings...
Pero may nakabitin pa ring tanong... ano kayang nangyari? at ang kadalasang kasagutan eh:

1. kasi di pala kami para sa isat-isa;
2. Nagkamali ako sa kanya;
3. iniwan lang nya ko ;
4. may iba na syang mahal;
5. niloko lang nya ko;
6. Di ako gusto ng parents nya;
7. ayoko na, puro na lang kami away;
8. masyado nya kong nasasaktan;
9. nagsawa na sya sa akin;

pero ito ang pinaka masakit;.

10.HINDI PALA NYA AKO TALAGANG MAHAL (parang panakip butas)

Ang sakit, hindi ba?

Pero kailan kaya natin maririnig na nagpapasalamat ang isang umiibig sa taong nakasakit sa damdamin nya?
Minsan naisip din kaya natin kung ano ang kahalagahan ng isang bagay, yung kailangang bigyan ng halaga habang nandyan pa!
Minsan kasi, saka lang natin nalalaman ang siyang kahalagahan ng isang bagay pag wala na ito sa atin!!!
Kaya minsan din isipin natin yung mga sinasabi, kinikilos, at ginagawa natin kasi hindi lahat ng tao kayang tanggapin kung ano at paano natin ginagawa ang isang bagay!

Subukan nating magpasalamat sa kabila ng lahat...

A. kung sinaktan ka nya... magpasalamat ka dahil sya ang dahilan para maging matibay ka;
B. kung niloko ka nya... patawarin mo at pasalamatan mo... nang dahil sa kanya nararamdam mo ang sakit at natuto ka na ang tunay na pag ibig ay hindi laging naghahatid ng ligaya... at kung walang sakit, hindi mo ma-aapreciate ang tunay na kaligayahan;
C. kung hindi ka nya minahal... pasalamatan mo! dahil kahit papano naramdaman mo na mahal ka nya kahit hindi, at ikaw minahal mo sya ng buong puso

Minsan kailangan lang natin harapin at tanggapin yung mga bagay o taong na nakasakit sa atin...
Huwag piliting kalimutan, kundi patawarin...
Tanggapin kung ano ang noon...
At taas noong harapin ang ngayon!
Dahil kung nasaktan ka man noon,
Ngayon mag-iingat ka na at alam mo na kung ano ang dapat para hindi ka masaktan.
Mahalin mo ang mga taong naka paligid sayo, at tanggapin mo ang taong nakasakit sayo dahil sila ang dahilan para maging matibay ka!
Mahalin mo ang sarili mo para sa susunod di kana padalos-dalos.
At pasalamatan mo ang taong nakasakit sayo...

Sino ba ang mas mahalaga,
Ang taong mahal mo o ang taong gusto mong mahalin?
Ang taong kasama mo buong araw o ang taong iniisip mo bago matapos ang araw?
Siya bang kasa-kasama mo sa lahat ng ginagawa mo o siyang dahilan ng lahat ng bawat kilos, at galaw mo?

Sino ba ang mas mahalaga...
Ang taong nais mong makasama habang buhay o ang taong hindi mo na makikita ang halaga ng buhay kapag wala siya?

Sino ang mas matimbang...
Ang taong pag kasama mo'y parang kay bilis ng oras o ang taong tuwing iniisip mo'y parang kay bagal ng sandali?

Ano ang susundin mo...
Ang idinidikta mo sa puso mo o ang idinidikta ng puso mo sayo?

Siya ba na laging pumapasok sa isip mo o siya na laging laman ng panaginip mo?

Sino nga ba...
Ang taong nagpaluha syo, o ang taong nagpahid sa minsang pagluha mo?

Sino sa kanila... ang taong muling nagpangiti sayo o ang taong dahilan ng lahat ng iyong pagluha?

Sino nga ba ang pipiliin mo?
ANG TAONG MULING MAGBUBUKAS NG PUSO MO...
O ANG TAONG MATAGAL NG NANDOON SA KULUNGAN NG IYONG PUSO?

Ron:)

SUICIDAL....

2007-10-30T04:47:00.000-07:00

Doubt or Faith...

2007-10-30T04:05:00.000-07:00

Doubt or Faith

Doubt or Faith
Where will you be?
Is it with faith?
Or choose doubt either

If you say You have faith;
Is it enough For you to hold on
It's easy to say we have faith
In every nod we affirm we are
But if we seek more I
t's hard or even unbelievable

If you say You're in doubt;
Is it enough For you to live with?
To doubt is easy for us
It's because we are afraid
Afraid to be hurt or be even with
Or maybe because we are just human

Doubt or Faith
Exactly Different things
And if you are to choose
Where will you be?

"Doubt sees the obstacles. Faith sees the way.
Doubt sees the darkest night. Faith sees the day.
Doubt dreads to take a step. Faith soars on high.
Doubt questions "Who believes"? Faith answers "I". "

Who Are Really Strong?...

2007-10-29T12:39:00.000-07:00

Sometimes life can be full of shit
Sometimes it seems like you just don't fit
Into the role you were meant to play
Sometimes it feels you don't want to stay
On this earth of sin and lies
No matter how much or how hard you try

As you walk down the halls during the day
You can hear them whisper, but not what they say
"What's wrong with me?" is what you ask yourself
Everyday while you sit in your office chair

The only ones that you can trust
Are the ones like you, the ones who must
Go through life, the unwanted role
And feel better off to be all alone

The ones who lies awake all night long
Listening through their headphones to their favorite rock song
The ones who think that suicide is a friend
But never have the guts to just give in

They are the ones who give in to drugs
They're the ones who are really needing a hug
They're the ones who are always having sex
So in a way they feel they have respect

The ones who are freaky, weird, and scary
But everyone around them all just barely
Knows them for who they really are
No one knows the stories behind the scars

That have been placed on appearance and emotions
And all night long their tears run like oceans
"I want to die" is what they say
They think about it everyday

They always try to find the best way
To end their long and shameful days
The pills? the razor? the little rope?
They all seem to shine like a ray of hope

Then they think of the ones they trust
The ones like them, the ones who must
Go through life the unwanted role
And feel better off to be all alone

Then they think that even though life is full of shit
And sometimes it seems they'll never fit
Into the role they were meant to play
They actually decide they want to stay

On this earth of sin and lies
But they promise themselves that they'll try
To find a better way to help themselves out I
nstead of taking the permanent route

So, they're the ones who are really strong
Who put up with preps all day long
But when they get home, at the end of the day
They smile and say "I made it through another day!"

"BIYAYA"

2007-10-29T12:10:00.000-07:00

October 17, 2007....isang kaibigan ang dumaing sa akin...

"Ron, sa tingin ko talaga may posibilidad na maipasok na ako dun..."

napatingin ako sa kanya at bahagyang nanlaki ang aking mga mata.

"bakit naman?" kunot noo kong tanong.

"hindi ko na kasi minsan makontrol ang sarili ko,..pakiramdam ko talaga may pag-asa akong mapunta dun."

muli ay napatingin ako sa kanya. saglit akong nag-isip.("at least di ako nag-iisa".) naibulong ko sa aking sarili.

tumingin ako sa kanya at bahagyang ngumiti.

"ako din".

sa pagkakataong yun ay sabay kaming nagkatawanan at napailing sa aming mga sarili.

Ang kaibigan ko, halos magkapareho kami sa maraming bagay, ika nga ng iba eh pareho na daw yata ang takbo ng utak namin at ang likaw ng bituka namin. (yun nga lang mas malakas syang kumain kesa sa akin). Kung baga sa lebel ng pagkakaibigan, sa lahat ng malapit sa akin ay siya na ang nasa pedestal. May mga pagkakataong sa tingin at kilos pa lang ay alam na namin ang ibig sabihin, mga oras na magkasabay sinasabi ang mga magkakaparehong bagay at salita, at yung mga pagkakataong napapagalitan na kami dahil sa wala na daw kaming ginawa kundi ang mag-usap ng mag-usap na para bang ang tagal tagal naming hindi nagkita, samantalanag magkasama kami sa trabaho buong maghapon, at sa bahay naman buong magdamag.

We share same stories, we read same books, pareho ang klase ng taong inaayawan namin, at halos pareho kami ng mga iniisip. The tough version of me, someone who mirrors my personality given our own differences. Someone who knew himself better, idol ko nga siya eh, dahil alam ko na mas matatag siya kesa sa akin.

Kapag may problema, (as in hindi simpleng problema) palagi na'y tinitingnan niya kung saan ito nag-uugat, kung ano ang mga kailangang aminin sa sarili, kung ano ang mga katotohanang dapat tanggapin para makabuo ng isang kongkretong solusyon. Kadalasa'y napag-kakamalang "mababaw", "mayabang" dahil sa wala siyang iniindang pagpapanggap para lang i-please ang iba, pero siya ay isang patas na tao, conscious siya sa maaaring makasama sa kalooban ng iba. Walang kulo sa loob, but then iba pa rin ang dating niya sa iba. Kapag may ilang taong nagpapakita ng hindi magandang asal at pakikitungo sa kanya, iniisip nyang ito ay may dahilan, na kung siya ay lulugar sa sitwasyon ng taong iyon ay malamang ganito rin ang gagawin nya. Isang taong literal na bukas ang pag-iisip, isang taong naibabalanse ang mga bagay-bagay ng ayon sa nais nitong ipahiwatig, isang taong likas na matalino, maunawain at totoong tao.

Yes, isa itong "too good to be true" na pag-uugali. Na kung lahat ng tao ay may ganitong pananaw ay mabubuhay tayo ng walang pagpapanggap at puro katotohanan lamang. Pero ito ay imposible. Dahil maraming tao ang mahina, marami ang mas gustong paniwalaan ang sa tingin nila ay maganda, maraming taong nakikita lang ang glittering images sa salamin ng buhay nila. Yung tipong kung nakapostura ay ganun din ang repleksyon sa salamin, kung ikaw ay guro, artista, musikero, pintor, manunulat, doktor, pulis, inhenyero, arkitekto, pulitiko, at iba pang klase ng tao, na nabubuhay sa anino ng kanilang katayuan sa lipunan.

Ang salamin mismo ang sarili natin, pero tumitingin lang tayo dito para makita kung ano ang gusto nating makita, (hindi yung katotohanan natin) kung tama ba ang pagkakaayos ng mga detalyeng sumisimbolo sa ating sarili para sa ibang tao. Hindi natin ito tinitingnan ng mas malalim, sa kabila ng katotohanang halos tuklawin na lang tayo nito.

Ganun talaga,...ang mundo,..ang lahat ay nabubuhay sa anino ng imaheng nais nilang makita ng ibang tao sa kanila, lahat ay nabubuhay sa paraang gusto nila (eh buhay nila yun eh)... sabi nga eh isang beses lang naman tayo mabubuhay, at ito ay hiram pa, at ang ibat-ibang relihiyon kasama na ang mga walang pinapanigan at hindi sigurado sa sarili nila ay may kanya-kanyang paniniwala kung saan nagmula ang buhay na ito, at kung saan ito patutungo.

Likas na kakaunti lamang ang mga taong may biyaya na katulad ng sa taong malapit sa akin. At mas lalong kakaunti ang mga taong likas na nakakaunawa sa mga taong katulad nila. Sobrang kunti na nga lang nila, ang iba pa ay nakakulong sa isang institusyon na nagtatawanan, nag-iiyakan, naghihiyawan, may iba na gumugulong sa sahig, tumatalon sa kama at ang iba ay tuluyan ng nahulog ang loob sa dingding ng silid na iyon dahil hindi na nya ito hinihiwalayan, at hindi sila matanggap kahit ng kanilang sariling kadugo.

Ganun ang katotohanan sa kanila, at kung ikaw mismo ay taglay ang ganung "biyaya" ay makakaisip ka na baka nga ikaw ang abnormal, dahil ang mundo...ang tao...hindi nila matanggap ang katotohanan na mas malakas ka, mas totoo ka, mas matalino ka dahil alam mo ang mga higit na mahahalagang bagay sa buhay at kung papano mo ma-i-enhance at maibabalanse ang ganitong taglay mmong kapangyarihan ay nasasaiyo na, kung ayaw mong mapasok "doon" sa lugar na yon.

Pwede mo ng isipin na "life in this world is the hell itself" at masuwerte ang mga taong namatay ng nakangiti...although, kunti na lang sila ngayon...may mga tao nga bang nabuhay ng masaya sa mundong ito.

Kaya sa aking kaibigan, hindi ka nag-iisa, pero hindi din tayo magiging candidate para sa mga nasisiraan ng bait...

masyadong masikip na ang lugar na 'yon para sa atin...

ronraf

My First Blog Post...

2007-10-29T11:31:00.001-07:00

FACT or FICTION

How do you separate the two or fuse them?

The devirginizing of my mind has started 13 years ago (i was then in 3rd year highschool) and the tools I utilized to pour out what came in as bursts of inspiration, desperation, confusion, revulsion and whatever “ion” there was, were more than sufficient and accessible.

Readers have asked me which is the truth and which is fabrication after reading my write ups. They have asked me if my characters were based on people I know or meet everyday, or merely a personification of my inner demons and angels. Yes, I have a halo encircling the two horns that protrude from my head. I answer with statements that lead them to ask more questions....hehehe Somehow, I am flattered. The fact that there are some people interested with what I write gives me the confidence to write more. It means that at some point I am getting somewhere with something I have always considered an underdeveloped talent.

Although having other people read my work started to become eerie because I realized they are reading deep down my own soul; the vain, evil and dispassionate persona who resides inside me can’t get enough satisfaction from just pouring out what needs to be buried instead inside the time capsule called “Past”.

Still, it is amazing--- what a simple line from a poem or a quote that you penned yourself could do to another.

Conceived purely for the reader’s unknown purpose of why they read my work, I offer no apologies if I step on someone’s bloating ego. If you are one of them, do drop a line or two on the thread. It means a lot to the writer when he gets some feedback. Pwede n’yo naman akong supilin or kahit murahin kung sa tingin n’yo kayo yung walang hiyang character sa kwento ko. But be fair. Do it in a way other people would read how you reacted.

But okay. I'm going to be honest. My articles were not created “purely” for my reader’s entertainment. I don’t keep diaries and I think posting my write ups here is a better way of cannibalizing my own life. The world is such a small place! Who would have thought it would get smaller by clicking an electronic mouse? So I might as well make it a little bit tinier by having some people get into my own planet. Make them see how it is in my own universe. And to make things clear, I am NOT, in any way, on a mission to dominate the world. I aim to dominating my OWN world because most of the time, I don’t even know what’s really going on outside my home. I just wanted to be a freethinker, not a critic or barrel of negativity.

To my readers, be brave enough to admit you had been reading my articles. Don’t praise my work if you can’t even say it out loud and say it where everybody could read it. If you have time picking your nose while nobody is looking around, I am so sure you have time leaving comments for my works. Don't read them if you don't want a Power Point Presentation of your pathetic life flash before you. I don't write them to make you feel you are special. I write to make myself feel special. Be wise enough to know the difference.

As I’ve said, my other persona is vain and ruthless. He could kill using just one word and bury you deep within your own.